Bad Things

Becoming a Knight

A wonderful night as I joined Rose-Croix this evening. Or, to give it the full title, Knights of the Pelican and Eagle, and Sovereign Princes Rose-Croix. So this means I became a Knight and a Prince.

This rates as one of the best nights I have had in Freemasonry. I know some look at my masonic activities as weird. But masonry is about thinking about yourself, it makes you look inward, to consider your motives, and to reflect on being better. It is an allegorical play. I haven't completely taken in tonight, but it was incredibly moving.

A friend told me that the ceremony would be what non-masons would imagine we would get up to. I can see what he means. No, there was not a goat. And I didn't have to roll up a trouser leg (at least, not this time). But I know what he means. A lot of symbolism. And, interestingly, from the New Testament, my other experiences are Old.

I was (almost) speechless.

Dixie Chicks - Landslide (Sheryl Crow Version)

Wonderful song, not sure about the vid.

Odd One Out

There seems to be a move to change to a multiple choice type exam system. This seems a backward step to me. Interviewed on the radio this morning a supporter of this idea said that multiple choice has come a long way and can now seriously test knowledge. OK, while remaining slightly sceptical, I won't outright argue with that. But then his main reason was that essays are excruciatingly written, that they are often gibberish. THIS IS NOT A REASON TO CHANGE. This is a reason to address the school system (I nearly said teaching, but it isn't the teachers at fault). It is a false argument to say that because someone can't do something then they shouldn't have to. Language is important. Computers do multiple chioce. Humans do eloquence, we formulate arguments, we discuss. My job requires me to be able to put pen to paper and explain things to people. I need to be able to answer complaints in a way people can understand. I need to put forward complex science to those who never studied it. I need to be able to adjust and temper my words to suit the level of the audience. I need to craft my thoughts and expression in a way that appeals to people, that helps them capture my passion. If we simply turn out children who know facts but can't utilise the information then we are doing them a disservice, and we are crippling our future workforce. The answer is not always B.

Be Bop

One problem with an iPod is that you can put everything on it. I have over 11 days of music recorded. And some of it is my daughters music. So driving to Cardiff yesterday and back today she was able to ask for her favourite album. Twice on the way down. Twice on the way back. I now know it so well that I find myself singing along. Which could be OK. Except it is "Same Difference". When I complained to my daughter that it wasn't doing my street cred any good, I got shouted at. So if you meet me and wonder why I am humming teeny pop at least you now know why.

Come On The Blues

I'm seriously getting back into my rugby again. For a few years following a team has been difficult. But I am managing to see a few more matches on TV, and there are some good summary programmes. As I live in Northampton I do support the Saints, but my REAL team are the Cardiff Blues, as I grew up going to every match.


They were playing at Gloucester today. That's a hard fixture. Always a hard place to win, Gloucester are a tough team, the supporters tougher. After 27 minutes Cardiff had a player sent off. We can debate whetehr or not it was really a head but, we can debate whether the Gloucester player took a dive, but wahtever it meant Cardiff were down to 14 men for the rest of the match. I almost gave up at that point. As it was we ahd to get in the car to return home. I managed to convince "A" to let me turn off the music when there was about 15 minutes of play left and I listened to the rest of the match. And, incredily, Cardiff won. I don't know what happened to Gloucester, they should have taken up the baton and run Cardiff into the ground, but in the last 5 minutes it was like Gloucester were the team with a man down. They were exhausted, and somehow Cardiff kept on coming, to be the only team to score a try in the match. A wonderful victory.

Darwin Awards 2008

Always an important time of year:

Eighth Place
In Detroit , a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.

Seventh Place
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who 'totally zoned when he ran,' accidentally, jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run.

Sixth Place
While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom, when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.

Fifth Place
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.

Fourth Place
Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.

Third Place
After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers also drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop.
The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt.

HONORABLE MENTION
Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just driving around at 2:00 A.M. so they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss out the window to see what would happen. Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed.

RUNNER UP
Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope's; Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable, lay near by. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and then tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located.

AND THE WINNER IS....

Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt fed his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded. The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves... 'Shit happens'.

Wrong Turn

Those of you who follow me on Plurk or Facebook will already realise I didn't have one of my better days today. The kind of day that makes you wonder why you spent so long at Uni. I had a meeting on the outskirts of London. On a good day an hour and a quarter drive. On a bad day a three hour drive. I left myself a tiny bit of time and hoped. And indeed the roads smiled favourably on me and I got there quarter of an our early. Much to my surprise there was parking sapce. That is almost unheard of and I haven't managed to park in the car park for over two years. I went and rang the doorbell. It was answered. I said which meeting I had arrived for. And then they told me it was supposed to be a telephone confernce. How stupid did I feel? And they were sweet, kind, offered me tea, said I could use a room there etc. They were ever so nice. Which did nothing to make me feel any less stupid. So I got back in the car and used the hands free to join the conference as I drove back.

The Interview Game

Rainbow Dreams was "interviewed" and I said I would be pleased to play along. First let me thank Rainbow Dreams for giving me questions that have an amazing potential to make me sound shallow. Now, on with the show:

1. Do you have any unfulfilled dreams and what are they?
Dreams rather than things I want to do? I would like to run a coffee shop with a secondhand bookshop (or vice versa), I would like to own a B&B somewhere wild, travel to Japan. But "dreams" implies something a bit more. Things that would have a deep effect on me, would alter my view of the world, would help me understand.
So:
Go to Canada to see Polar Bears and the Aurora Borealis (I have already been there to see Orcas and that was an intense experience)
Swim with dolphins - but there is a caveat, these need to be wild dolphins, not the semi-tamed ones

2. Desert Island discs...which three songs would you want with you on a desert island and why.
I don't like the idea of limiting myself to only three songs, that is really really hard. And I need to avoid the obvious ones like Chasing Cars, Hallelujah (the Jeff version not the X-Factor version), Pachelbel. I have 446 albums (over 11 days worth) on my iTunes, and I have to pick three. I will have a sleepless night, wanting to repeatedly change my choices.

Chris Rea - "Stainsby Girls"

Cowboy Junkies - "Sun Comes Up, It's Tuesday Morning"

Indigo Girls - "Mystery" (just, also considering "Power of Two" and "Language or the Kiss", but at the end it has to be "Mystery")

As to why, that makes it sound as though it has to be something meaningful. It is simple, they are great songs, and I can lose myself in them.

3. What is your biggest fear?
What, other than being stuck on a desert island with only three songs! Maybe wishing I had done more, I don't want to have regrets. But probably biggest fear, losing my daughter, a few days away from her because of work is bad enough, I can't imagine a world without her that isn't empty

4. If you could swap your life with anothers just for one day who would you swap with and why?
I am going to assume this has to be someone alive because otherwise, if they are dead, technically I will be spending the day in a coffin, which doesn't sound fun.
So, White House Press Secretary would be good, I'll swap with whoever has the job at the moment. Some of my best times at work are working with the media, responding to issues, developing communication campaigns. The White House Press Secretary takes it to another level, the ultimate in handling off the cuff, rapid response, being able to think on your feet, and I would love the adrenalin rush for 24 hours.

5. What is the nicest/ kindest thing anyone has ever done for you?
Is it sad to say I am struggling with this one? Makes it sound as though no-one likes me. I have been blessed, and my life has been filled with kind people but, put on the spot, I draw a blank. Except one thing that keeps coming to mind. And it is every time my daughter spontaneously runs up to me and gives me a hug, every time she greets me when I get home, every time she writes me a note to say she loves me. The love my daughter gives me, unconditionally, has got to be the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.


now the rules if you want to play....
•Leave me a comment requesting an interview.
•I will e-mail you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
•You then answer the questions on your blog.
•You should also post these rules along with an offer to interview anyone else who e-mails you wanting to be interviewed.
•Anyone who asks to be interviewed should be sent 5 questions to answer on their blog.
•It would be nice if the questions were individualized for each blogger.

Money To Burn

Last night I watched the first in a series that I think could be interesting. I believe it was called "millionaire traders" or similar. Someone who has been a succesful trader is putting up his money for complete novices to trade. It is a strangeconcept. And it is at a time when the markets are collapsing, bad timing at its most obvious. The "real" trader is already frustrated that the team are losing money but I have no sympathy for him. In fact he seems a bit of an idiot really. You can't blame people who have no understanding of the market for not placing bids in the right area. I know how hard it is. I have dabbled, only small amounts. And a lot of my shares have then done very well. The problem is that I failed to sell them WHEN they were doing well. I always hung on too long. And it doesn't take long for profit to turn to loss.

PS If anyone can explain short bids to me then please go ahead, even after an hour I was still confused.

All In The Taste

Why

are weekends over so quickly?

Webb Ellis

I took "A" to her first rugby match today. Been building up to it for a few weeks. Northampton vs Leicester. 3pm kick off.

We arrived at 2:30 pm. Quiet, I thought. But I am used to Cardiff and maybe Northampton is quieter. They let us in, took our tickets. And after 15 minutes I thought "it really is quiet". Went to a steward and asked about kick off. To be told it was 5 pm. I checked the tickets and they definitely said 3pm. But apparently three weeks earlier, ie after tickets had been printed and sold etc, Sky had decided they wanted to show the match so the time was changed.

I didn't like Sky before. But how ridiculous is this. What if I had something else planned for the evening when I bought the tickets. It isn't as if it is free (well, actually, in our case today it was but that's not the point). People have plans and calendars are arranged in advance. If you buy a ticket for something that is stated as a certain time then that is what time it should be on. And the person at the turnstile who took our ticket should ahve at least pointed out that we had arrived two and a half hours early! I mean, I could have had a young child with me for her first match - oh yes, so I did! And the suggestion that I spend the time in the bar wasn't really a good one with a 6 year old at my feet.

Thanks to some helpful stewards it turned out well, and "A"s first match was a success.

B.....r

I just wrote a 5 paragraph blog and then blogger deleted it all. Not happy

Weather Brother

On the weather report this morning the reporter said that later the weather would turn "misty and murky". I couldn't help but wonder if this weather was any relation of Pinky and Perky.

Songtime

My New Years resolution (or one of them) was to keep a photo diary on Facebook. This isn't to be a case of chasing the light, or particularly arty photos. I am still trying to get photos I can frame, but those take time. This is a more simple aim, to manage to use my brain for something other than work for at least a few minutes. To look and think that there is a world, I am not living in a black box.

Work is the most likely thing to destroy this resolution but, despite a conference in Manchester for the last few days, I am succeeding (and before any friends in Manchester complain I didn't say hello, believe me, we don't get much of a chance to breath at these things, every minute of the day booked up). Hence most of the photos are from my hotel room! Today, driving back I stopped at the Manchester Valley Health Walk. Now, I admit that the main reason for stopping was to see if the little shop there had something I could buy my daughter. "A" and I had a chat a few days ago and it appears that biscuits and sweets from the hotel do not quite do it. Apparently, and a quote, "little girls always like stickers" (oh, I am so dreading the teenage years). Well I couldn't find stickers but I did find a badge and a pencil sharpener. The response to which when i got home was, "no chocolate?" I feel I will never get it right.

Anyway, the point of this blog. I found the Manchester Valley Health Walk a strange place. Incongruous. Standing at one point I had the sound of the motorway behind me and to the right, to my left the hiss of a very angry electricity pylon which sounded as though every volt was trying to escape. And yet, in front of me, bird song, uncountable numbers of birds making joyous noise. A wren flitting over the ice only 5 feet away. It was almost surreal. Nature managing to go on despite humans trying to destroy the landscape. And there was something extremely peaceful about it.

Put Your Left Arm In

"A" had my private lesson today. She wasn't sure about having "K" as an instructor because I have commented before on how hard she works me, but I told "A" that "K" would be great. And she was. "A" ended up on Bubbles, who is almost as big as Midnight but right from the start "A" was smiling. And she ended up laughing during the lesson. After a lot of walking, changing rein etc, "K" got the lunge reins out. "A" has never seen these before so didn't know what to expect. They started easily with a bit of trotting but then "K" started getting "A" to let go of her reins, first with one hand, then the other, and then both. All the time continuing trotting. Luckily "A" seemed to trust "K" and did it. They turned it into a game, almost a Simon says kind of thing, toch you knee, touch you head, stretch to the side etc.

So I am pleased to reort that "A" has her confidence back. I am less pleased to reort that I know seem to have lost my instructor as "A" wants her all the time. Hard luck, I miss my riding.

Riding Woe

Sometimes it is really difficult knowing what the right thing to do is as a parent. Last Tuesday "A" had a horrible riding lesson. Midnight was playing up, kept throwing his head down which, when you are just over 6, can be very hard to control (in fact is hard to control whatever age you are). Her arms must have felt like they were being jerked out of their sockets. She ended up in tears, serious tears. I wanted to tell them to stop the lesson but also felt that wouldn't help. But I felt terrible watching her in tears and unable to help.

At her lesson this evening it was clear that Midnight had unnerved her. Although she had a different pony she just didn't look comfortable. Whereas she normally has good posture, back straight, sitting back in the saddle, tonight she was hunched over and leaning forwards. Her face also looked so unhappy. The instructor commented to me how "A" didn't look as good as normal. She has been doing really well until now and they seem to think she is quite good (for her age and experience, obviously not going to be at the Horse of the Year show in 2009). Tonight she looked as though it was her first time on a horse.

But "A" says she wants to keep riding. I am very proud that she hasn't just given up. But I am also worried that she is saying she will continue just because she knows her daddy enjoys riding and so she wants to do it. I certainly don't want to watch her hating every lesson. Admittedly she looked more comfortable by the end and she even had a smile (she also saw three other girls end up in tears tongiht, rough times at the moment at riding). And we have decided to have a private rather than group lesson next to try and get her confidence back.

What Did You Do In The War

Anyone else watching Mastermind see Ian Lavender come on? As he sat down, asked by John Humphreys, "your name?" And Rick Wakeman shouted across "don't tell him Pike"!

U2 Sweetest Thing

Mirrors in Mirrors in Mirrors

'Warcraft' Sequel Lets Gamers Play A Character Playing 'Warcraft'

Eat Up

I remember my mother telling me to eat breakfast. The most important meal of the day they say. Well now I find that by regularly eating breakfast my sexual enlightenment was delayed. How annoyed am I! If only I had realised that was where I was going wrong. You can bet I would have cut out the toast in the morning at uni.

Wobble

"A" has her first wobbly tooth. She is so exited. And she can't keep her fingers out of her mouth. I have told her that if she pulls it out too early then blood will flow from her mouth like vomit, but she doesn't seem to believe me. The funny thing is that "J" has a "thing" about wobbly teeth and hates it (only another 19 to go!). It doesn't worry me at all so I just laugh. And I can still remeber the worst thing about wobbly teeth, it's when you are fiddling with one and manage to spin it 180 degrees in the socket but then it gets stuck!!!! Ah, happy days.

PPPPPPP Pick Up

So, slightly behind the times with this one, it missed me at the time, but knighting a penguin? It seems a curious choice, a penguin, as a mascot. Especially for an elite troop such as the Kings Guard. You would think they would want something inspiring, fear provoking, grand even. A tiger, a polar bear, along those lines. But a penguin? Suitable if you were the Clowns troop maybe. What image are they trying to convey? The only thing worse would be an Okapi (ten bonus points if you can name that reference).

Christmas Decs

Aargh

I have spent most of this evening fighting with my computer. Horrible things. Hate them.

You Spin Me Right Round Baby, Right Round

I am a little out of synch because I am now going to blog about yesterdays riding lesson. But, as nothing much happened today, this seems allowable.

I haven't been able to go riding for the last two weeks. Someone have, rather inconsiderately, taken what I consider to be MY slot. It is perfectly timed to coincide with "A"s lesson and I don't want to leave her hanging around for 30 minutes. Or, to be honest, I don't want her watching me for half an hour. So a few weeks agao I cleverly booked ahead so that I could get my slot back. Very pleased to be going riding again yesterday. I had missed it. To be fair, the last lesson had been really frustrating. Wolfie had not wanted to play along and I just couldn't get him to canter more than a few strides. I was having to kick so hard to get him going that I was then losing my balance. I felt rather better last week when I watched someone else riding Wolfie and they were faring worse. It might be unfair to take succour from another troubles but seeing her unable to stop him and having to ride him into the corner of the school did cheer me up somewhat (he was at the walk so no risk of damage to him or rider).

There, so I was looking forward to the lesson yesterday. We arrived. The yard was being set up for some show jumping. The jumps were in the indoor arena. Where the youngsters have their lessons. O well I thought, they will probably go out for a hack and I will have the outdoor school as usual. It was about then that I realised that while I was going to be in the outdoor school, so were the children, at the other end. This meant they (in particular my daughter) would be able to watch. In addition, all the parents, who are normally indoors as well, would be watching their loved ones and, by default, me. This was a disconcerting turn of events. It is one thing to be a fool in front of a nice and understanding (and to be honest fairly cute) instructor, rather another to do it in front of a host of other people.

Luckily I had had a rather good idea. I asked for a whip. The theory in my head being that with a whip I wouldn't have to kick as much, would therefore maintain my balance, and ultimately would manage to canter properly. And, I am pleased to say, the theory worked. Well, worked enough. Wolfie is a big horse. Cantering in a circle is not a strong point for him, he doesn't like corners. So, while I did manage a canter, I can't profess to have been in as much control as is desirable. I just hope that the spectators thought I meant to spiral him in at a canter and stop just short of running over the instructor.

Christmas Frustration

Watch Hammerdance videos and dance lessons at DanceJam.com

Christmas Is Coming

Olympia

For years I have wanted to go to the Olympia Horse Show. Today we went. And it lived up to expectation. Wonderful fun. So much happening and all kinds of different bits to the show. "A" was able to sit through it all as well, with only a little bit of boredom during the long show jumping in the second half. But she really enjoyed it and wants to go again next year. So do I.

The only problem was the getting there. Problems at South Kensington meant that the train was very delayed. We were on the underground and it was stuck at a station. The driver kept giving us updates but he was a little odd. When we were about to leave he actually said "Alllllll abooooaaaarrrrd". Then at one point he said "by the law of averages we should get moving soon"!

James Yuill - No Surprise

This is really quite fun

Guest Number One

I've been in Edinburgh today. I was never going to make it home but thought I would set off and put an hour or so under my belt so it is a shorter journey tomorrow. After an hour driving I quizzed the sat nav to find a hotel nearby. It found me Auchen Castle. I rang and they had a room. Not all rooms have wi-fi so I nearly didn't stop, but I could see it from the road and it looked nice, whereas the weather and driving was horrible. Despite the fact that it is a castle the prices were extremely (and I mean extremely, better than the Holiday Inn last night) reasonable. And I do have wi-fi in the room after all, which is great, I don't have to sit in the lounge in my undies to blog and plurk!

Anyway, to the point. Despite the fact that this is a lovely place, I am the only guest. That's right, the only one. I am not sure I have ever stayed in a hotel before and been the only guest. It is weird. Very weird. The closest I can come to describing it is think of the first time you had to stay with your prospective parents in law. Do you see what I mean? Each course of your meal they are desperate that you are happy, you are saying thank you every time you see them. They are trying to look after you. You are trying not to be too intrusive. everyone making loads of effort to make sure everyone else is happy. They want you to be glad you chose them. You want to seem unobtrusive, don't want to be disturbing their time.

Still, it's a wonderful hotel, and this bathrobe is just so cosy.

The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini

I hadn't really wanted to read this. I picked it up because of a 3 for 2 offer and I couldn't spot anything else. So somewhat ironic that I couldn't put it down once I started.

At times shocking, if it is anything near an accurate description of the Taliban then this is a very sad world. But in reality it is about a man trying to find redemption, haunted by the ghosts of his past.

The descriptive passages are beautiful and work well to make you feel there. Certainly some of the plot line is a bit predictable, at times Hosseini almost telegraphs what will happen in 5 to 10 pages time. Because some of these things are so sad in some ways it is nice to have prior warning as the shock is less. In fact that may be why he does it. Almost a "brace yourself, bad news coming" approach. So don't even start this book if you are looking for a feelgood factor. It isn't going to raise you up there. But if you appreciate beautiful writing with a well woven storyline then this is for you.

Quotes:
"You're gutless. It's how you were made. And that's not such a bad thing because your saving grace is that you've never lied to yourself about it. Not about that. Nothing wrong with cowardice as long as it comes with prudence. But when a coward stops remembering who he is.. God help him. "

"Quiet is peace. Tranquility. Quiet is turning down the volume knob on life. Silence is pushing the off button. Shutting it down. All of it."

"I piss on the beards of all those self-righteous monkeys. "

Slight Rambling

OK, trying to write Christmas Cards after a martini and a bottle of wine may not have been a great idea. And I will come back to that. But the martini bit of that sentence. I have never been a great cocktail fan. Then a few weeks ago in a rather nice London hotel for some unknown reason I decided to have a Ginger Cosmopolitan. It was probably the "ginger" in the title that did it, rather a liker of ginger am I. But for whatever reason I ordered it, and wow, wonderful refreshing drink with a nice kick to it. Now, a I understand it, and I am a bit vague on this, a cosmopolitan is basically an abused martini. So I bought the ingredients for a martini, and for a cosmopolitan, as well as some rather nive cocktail glasses (which may call for the camera at some point). And tonight made a rather strong martini. I think cocktails will ahve to be a weekend thing, otherwise nothing will get done.

Anyway, Christmas Cards. Over the last few years I have been trying to cut down on cards. It's a tough thing because peope can feel left out and forgotten. But I feel the whole purpose of Christmas is served better by a donation to charity. So, if you don't get a card from me it doesn't mean I am not thinking of you - at this time of year I am thinking of all of you, thanking the Grand Architect for my friends, praying for your health and happiness for the coming year. But if you will feel upset about not receiving a card then please let me know, I will be happy to sen you one.

Have You Got It?

Words cannot begin to describe how pleased I am that the X Factor is over. While I like the theory of us having a family evening, it is one thing to be watching a film, quite a different one to watch the X Factor. The reality is that I have ended up in the corner working on the computer while the others watch the singing. But at least this year the finalists could sing. The only good one last year was Rhydian. I was rather worried that Eowain (is that how it was spelt) would win, the Irish and Granny vote seemed his for sure. Instead it came through to Alexandra or JLS. Then they sang Hallelujah. And there is no question, JLS should have won. I had goosebumps as they sang. Now, Hallelujah has a special place for me after it played during a scene in West Wing, and anyone who has seen that scene will know why it is so moving. So I am now disapppointed that the JLS version won't be available to buy. Alexandra was good, and I am pleased for her, but the nation got it wrong.

And the original:

The Ting Tings - Be The One

I haven't yet thanked 1iz for introducing me to the Ting Tings, so thank you 1iz:

Keeping A Seat Warm

Last night was the first meeting I attended as a Past Master, specifically the Immediate Past Master. Unfortunately work commitments meant I had missed the last two meetings. It's very odd being IPM. 8 years or so ago I started on the "ladder", each year taking on a new office and each year getting more to do. Then it culminated in the year in The Chiar, with an incredible amount to do and no reading of books for a year as I learnt all my lines. And suddenly you are over the crest and it isn't a gentle slope down, it's a plummet. I had all of four lines to learn for last night. That is one evening of learning, no more. And during the ceremony my main role is acting as prompt if anyone gets stuck. It serves as a good lesson in humility, from the most important in the Lodge to someone who is, frankly, expendable. And maybe that is the final lesson to learn on the path from Initiate to IPM.

But, that said, it was a good night. For the first time I was able to sit next to my father during the ceremony, and that was nice. And it was good to see friends, to share in the seasons goodwill to others.

Flying Pickets - Only You

Chris Rea - Stainsby Girls

I Am Not A Number

You Are 4: The Individualist

You are sensitive and intuitive, with others and yourself. You are creative and dreamy... plus dramatic and unpredictable. You're emotionally honest, real, and easily hurt. Totally expressive, others always know exactly how you feel. At Your Best: You are inspired, artistic, and introspective. You know what you're thinking, and you can communicate it well. At Your Worst: You are melancholy, alienated, and withdrawn. Your Fixation: Envy Your Primary Fear: To have no identity Your Primary Desire: To find yourself Other Number 4's: Alanis Morisette, Johnny Depp, J.D. Salinger, Jim Morrison, and Anne Rice.

What Number Are You?

And In The Silver Car

F1 is going through some hard times at the moment. It remains to be seen whether its return to the BBC next year will be a good thing. Having Murray Walker back as a commentator sounds good. Not so sure of the wisdom of having Eddie Jordan and David Coulthard as the pundits though. Eddies job is going to be hard though as he will ahve to cover for two very quickly, as Coulthard will wander away after the first 5 laps - for the last few years he has forgotten that a race goes on longer than that.

Sick Too

I find that I get a lot of hits for my post discussing the "Logon process has failed to create the security options dialog" error message. This seems to be a continuing problem. I have posted a comment to the that post, but paste it as a new post as well as it may help:

The simplest and most reliable way to fix this problem is to uninstall "Service Pack 1". My computer is fine when that isn't installed, every so often it does a forced install, the problem returns, I uninstall and the problem goes.

Now the real problem, some programmes will only run if you have the Service Pack installed, something about resource allocation. So I can no longer uninstall. I have almost fixed it (meaning it is now an intermittent problem rather than constant problem). Turn of the side bar and Windows Defender. I believe that Windows Defender "argues" with other applications, such and anti-viral software.

There is a trick to turning off Windows Defender. It is a crafty little thing. First go in to "Programs", find Windows Defender, open it and turn it off. But, despite doing this, when you reboot your computer Windows Defender will still be running but in silent mode, ie it's running in "off" mode. To stop it running when you reboot you now need to go into msconfig (use the search bar). You will find "Windows Defencder" under the "Services" tab, AND IT IS STILL TICKED!!!!! Untick it. Ignore the warnings. And there you go.

Goodbye

It will just never be the same again. Terry Wogan is leaving Eurovision. All those barbed comments, the irony, the sarcasm. The Eurovision organisers may have complained about him but they are about to realise he was the best thing about the competition.

Open Up

In a world suffering from so much trouble, a Beach Hut Advent Calender is a beautiful inspired, and peaceful idea.

Splash

Take a moment to contemplate how on earth Synchronised Swimming has got funding for the Olympics when Athletics, or even Table Tennis, haven't. Remember that Boris said Ping Pong is coming home, not Flipper.

Now You See Me....

I believe in medicines. Obviously as a vet I should, after all I use them. But I also believe in some (note some) alternative therapies. I used to use acupuncture to treat some animals. And with animals it is hard to see how it can be a placebo effect (although there can be a placebo of the owner perceiving improvement). But with humans "mind over matter" can be important. And it is sometimes to do with fooling the mind into thinking itself better. And there may be no better example than using binoculars to reduce pain. That's right, looking at an injured body part can help reduce pain and swelling. But before any make readers start looking at certain parts of their anatomy and feeling good about themselves, the trick is to look through them from the wrong end. The idea is to make the affected part appear further away and smaller. The brain then sees less "risk" and is effectively less protective of the injury as it is more remote. It really is amazing how easy it is to fool our brain.

By The Way....

In case you missed it - Wales beat Australia. And I am still smiling (it was yesterday). I had to remain restrained throughout the match as "J" had a friend around, so I couldn't shout at the TV as I wanted. The tension in our house was palpable, it must have been unbearable in the stadium. Real to-and-fro stuff. Wales deserved the win but it was a close thing, and Aus scoring in the last minute meant I destroyed a couple of extra fingernails. But that makes Wales the only Northern Hemisphere team to manage to beat a Southern Hemisphere team. A good position to be in before the six nations starts. And I have to say, here and now, Andy Powell you are amazing, I didn't think that we would ever see a player that made Martyn Williams look average, but Andy Powell is in the thick of everything, always ready to receive the ball, always ready to break a couple of tackles. Great stuff. Wales are a pleasure to watch.

Realize - Colbie Caillat

V1: Take time to realize,
That your warmth is
Crashing down on in.
Take time to realize,
That I am on your side
Didn't I, Didn't I tell you.

But I can't spell it out for you,
No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you

C: If you just realize what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other
and will never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder if
we missed out on each other now.

V2: Take time to realize
Oh-oh I'm on your side
didn't I, didn't I tell you.
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Didn't I tell you

But I can't spell it out for you,
no it's never gonna be that simple
no I can't spell it out for you.

C: If you just realized what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder if
we missed out on each other now.

V3: It's not always the same
no it's never the same
if you don't feel it too.
If you meet me half way
If you would meet me half way.
It could be the same for you.

C: If you just realize what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realize what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder
Just realize what I just realized

If you just realize what I just realized

OoOoOOo

missed out on each other now
missed out on each other now

Realize, realize
realize, realize

Banker

Enlighten me please. We are in this financial mess because everyone stretched themselves too far. Banks gave 100% mortgages (and even gave people money in their pockets). You could take out excessive numbers of credit cards if you wanted. There were just so many ways to extend your credit that people ended up over-committed and then the money ran out.

So how does the government trying to force banks to increase loans actually help. What is needed is money in the pocket. This is achieved through tax cuts. Increasing lending just increases the long term problem. Cutting VAT means, even if the shops pass it on, that for every £100 spent you save all of £2.50. The public need to feel safer, and that is done by making sure their pockets feel full.

Maybe if Brown spent less time writing to X-Factor contestants then he would have more time to think about trying to get us out of this.

Bobby Rights

I posted a little while ago about the reluctance of the Brown government to let anyone question them. It seems they have taken this even further. Many would say that Damien Green was doing what he is paid for, an MP of the opposition bringing to light things that the government would prefer to keep hidden. Not things that affect national seurity but certainly things that affect our lives. And for that he was arrested. At a time when you would expect us to be on heightened alert after Mumbai, instead our counter-terrorist officers are raiding the offices and home of an MP. Brown is claiming he knew nothing about this and yet the plice rang both Boris and Cameron, seems hard to believe that they wouldn't extend that courtesy to the Prime Minister doesn't it. It seems Brown takes his premiership and as a divine right, and God help anyone who should doubt him.

Leg Bye

On the bright side, England cricketers returning from India at least means that they won't be subject to a 7-0 whitewash in the one day matches. In fact I am surprised they aren't suspects.

Sat Nav Required

A Chapter night tonight. Smaller group of people but a good group. Obviousl can't tell you too much bt for the following it is enough that you should know that it involves some scenes from biblical times. And someone is supposed to say they come from Babylon. However general amusement follows when, without realising, they say they "come from Basildon".

Any Value

Now you may want to call me cynical. But I am not sure how the drop in VAT will work. Ignoring the fact that it lays problems for the future (and that there is a possibility that the government are thinking of later raising it above the current rate), it risks being very ineffectual. I just feel that it is unlikely that the drop will be passed on in the shops. The High Street is already struggling, keeping an extra 2.5% on every sale could be the best opportunity they have of making a bit more money. I expect prices to remain the same.

Your Fault

Well that's a new error message. Completely honest:

"The file has failed to save. This failure has been caused by you"

So not only has my computer wipe some files it now also has an attitude about it!

Battle

I think I am going to lead a crusade to Yorkshire. Need to save them from the Moors.

Data Link

The government is now losing on average one computer a week. Now while the occassional loss may be understandable (actually it isn't, but if I say that then in less than a week I am bound to have to report I have lost mine) this attrition rate is beyond belief. And this is SINCE the loss of the two discs with half the countries information on them. I think that there is a saying, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. Well the government certainly are being fools and they should be ashamed. It isn't security that needs to be stepped up, it is simple attention to detail and a bit of care.

No Dialog

I am seriously fed up with the "Logon Process has failed to create the security options dialog" error box. It has been a repeated problem that I can only overcome by removing the Vista Service Pack 1. Every so often Windows automatically installs the Service Pack, I experience the crashes, then I reset to an earlier restore point. While that has worked, it isn't particularly satisfactory. Unfortunately it looks as though the new version of Everquest II won't run without the Service Pack, something about a resource issue. So once again I am battling with a computer that keeps crashing. Using my work laptop to search the Internet this doesn't seem an unusual problem, but there doesn't seem a reliable fix. I am hoping on it being Windows Defender. I have turned off Windows Defender in the program settings but that wasn't enough. I then had to go into the config program to discover that although Defender was turned off it was still loading (gee thanks Microsoft for that amazing piece of logic). Anyway now that is unchecked as well and we will see what tomorrow brings.

Silent Night

Westminster officials can be officially be dubbed the grinch of Christmas. They have banned Debenhams from playing carols becuase it constitutes noise pollution. I've been in London, it is not a quiet city. And a lot of the noise isn't pleasant. So an opportunity to lighten the atmosphere and give everyone a lighter moment is missed for some stupid reason that the music will disturb people. Debenhams even said they would turn the music down but that wasn't enough. Killjoys seems an understatement. I hope someone forgets to give them a Christmas present, certainly Santa Claus won't come down their chimney because that must breach quite a few health and safety regulations.

Londons Burning

So Citigroup have announced they are to cut over 50000 jobs. This is on top of a cull of over 20000 earlier in the year. Now not all of those will come from the UK. To be fair they can't, Citigroup only employ around 12000 people in the UK. But London is going to take a fair hit. Once over the initial shock of the numbers though I am left wondering HOW they can cut this many? Over 70000 jobs cut within a year. OK, so the recession is beginning to bite. But even so this is an amazingly big number. I can't help but think that they must have been over-staffed. How can you lose that many jobs and keep functioning, unless they weren't all needed to start with? I am not complacent, we are seeing cuts as well, and it means we all have to work harder. But that is rationalisation in the extreem.

Party Thought

Politics is a difficult game. When times are tough do you challenge decisions and run the risk of being accused of party politics, or do you go with your convictions and say what you think, asking the questions to make new policy. At the moment the fall back position of Labour is to accuse the Conservatives of only raising issues to score points. But decisions do need to be challenged, questions need to be asked. If Brown is confident of his position then he should have strong and robust answers, not simply going defensive.

Plurking

So I have found this thing called Plurk, really not sure if it is anything to get excited about. It seems to basically be taking the status option from Facebook and using that on a timeline. Bit of a short running diary. Giving it a go anyway.

I'm Mandy Fly Me

Or, in the case of Aer Lingus, don't. That's right, Aer Lingus does not come with the Merlin seal of approval. An incredibly inefficient airline. I don't want to be accused of stereotyping so I need to be careful, but they didn't seem to realise that the watches on their wrists were to tell tehm something. And then when they let us on the plane it was the most disorganised boarding I have seen, people milling around in the aisle so new passengers couldn't get on. And getting off was no better. I don't think they could work out how to open the door. To cap it all my bag has been completely beaten up, the identifying strap had come loose, and I haven't dared to look inside to see how much is broken.

Circling Around

The man who invented the roundabout (Eugene Henard, although Frank Blackmore invented the mini-roundabout I believe) should have been given a Nobel prize. This was a major improvement in road design, saving lives and aiding traffic flow. An innovation that deserves a massive amount of credit. So why, o why, is there an apparent fetish for sticking traffic lights on the things. Milton Keynes and Northampton have both suffered from a rash of treaffic lights sprouting up at roundabouts. And they completely defeat the purpose. The whole point of a roundabout is to keep a smooth flow of traffic. The moment you throw lights up then the flow stops. Then at peak times the roundabout becomes clogged. There is no room for new cars to enter and, at times, it even becomes impossible to escape. If lights are required then make it a junction, at least the road doesn't become blocked. But preferably just leave the roundabout alone and let it do its job.

Remembering

Class Act

There was a programme last week with John Prescott looking into class structure and whether it still exists in Britain. It made strange viewing. For someone who is so adamant about how bad class is he did a fine job of supporting the structure. A politician earning large amounts of money, with a lovely house and two Jags (he does have two now) and yet he still claims to be working class. Doesn't just claim it, is vehement about it. He fails to recognise, or refuses, that there is more mobility now, and that this is not a bad thing.

Even Prescott was confounded though when he was taken to meet a family living on benefits. They had 9 children but neither parent worked. Yet they could still by named gear for their children such as Nike. Prescott was asking the man of the family what he did? On the dole. But did he have a job when he left school? Yes he worked as a builder. How come he didn't still do that, the building industry had been doing well for years? Yes well he didn't like having to answer to other people, didn't like having a boss. So he wanted to have his own business? Yes but you need money for that. What about window cleaning? Oh yes I did that for a bit for a cleaning firm but wanted to be my own boss. So why didn't you set up yourself? You need money. What for? Ladders and the like. So, let me point out what I said a few lines up, they bought Nike clothing for their kids, and yet couldn't afford a ladder! The problem with the benefit system isn't that we help people, as a society we have a duty to look after each other, but we make it too easy for some people to kop out. It's self fulfilling. After you have been getting on quite comfortably on benefit why bother going back to work.

A seperate interview with a politician on the radio this week. He recounted a story about 18 years ago how a young pregnant girl had come to him asking for help. She thought that as the MP for the area he could get her a house. He did. Fast forward 18 years and a young pregnant girl comes in and asks for help getting a house. She tells him that she has come to him becuase he did so well in finding a house for her mother. What goes around comes around. We have to teach people responsibility. Saving them at the time isn't enough because then they will never break out of the mould. We have a duty to educate and to push people forward. And that duty is not served by giving people houses and money.

Lessons In Love

On the news yesterday it reported that last year 123 3 year olds were excluded from nursery/school. There was an implication that the teachers were failing. At 3 years old it isn't the teachers that at failing, it is the families. These children are being raised thinking that violence is an OK thing. They are not being taught manners and respect. And unfortunately the teachers then get the blame, but if the teachers try to do anything I am willing to bet that the parents defend their "innocent" child and try to sue.

Ooooo Weekend

After a long day that really is as far as my brain can go

Direction

One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree. "Which road do I take?" she asked. "Where do you want to go?" was his response. "I don't know," Alice answered. "Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."

Hey Big Spender

So in the end I went to bed at 0100 hrs. Let's just say common sense got the better of me. I had to go to work today, and staying up wouldn't change anything.

And I am pleased with the result. For a lot of reasons. But not least because these are tense times. Afghanistan and Iraq already at war. Iran and even Russia on the edge. The wrong person would have easily tipped it over. This now seems unlikely, a cooler head will prevail.

But in all of this there is one thing I find not only shocking but obscene. Here we are in a financial meltdown. People not having enough money to make ends meet. Record numbers of houses being repossessed. And during this election $1553 million were spent. That's correct. No typo. That is money that could have done so much good. Could have gone to medicine, health, education. It can't be right.

Not that our system is better when you look at money being spent. I think that in a democratic country each party should be given the same fixed amount. Whether you are independant or leader of a major party. Everyone should have an equal opportunity to put forward their case. No favouritism, the same time on television, the same number of posters. So what we hear is the views and not simply the volume. And certainly I hope that never again is $1553 million spent on an election.

Election Night

And I can't decide if I want to stay up for it

Lost in Translation

Always risky to rely on email. Especially if you are hoping for a translation. Swansea Council needed to stop heavy vehicles using a road. So they put up a sign reading "No entry for heavy goods vehicles. Residential site only". Now, if you know about signs in Wales then you will know they are always bilingual. So Swansea emailed their in-house translation service. They got a reply and put that on the sign. Unfortunately the person supposed to be translating was on holiday so, in fact, the reply was the out-of-office assistant and actually reads "I am not in the office at the moment. Please send any work to be translated". Back of the class for the boys then.

Downwards Trend

So my osteo said to me I could start riding as long as I didn't fall off. Stay on the horse, improve my posture and it will help my back. Fall off and that's a different matter.

Whoops.

I wasn't even suppose to be riding today. But they had a last minute cancellation so they could fit me in. And I went out on Wolfie. Wolfie is big, very big. He takes some working to get him going. So a plastic chair blowing over towards him when we have just started to trot is not good. Wolfie spooked. Wolfie moved sideways. Unfortunately I was moving up as part of the trot. When I came down Wolfie was no longer there. Gravity took effect and I continued downwards until I hit the ground. The instructor said it was a "heavy" landing. Yes, well, I am a heavy person. And I came from a long way up.

I am stiff, bruised and limping. But I got back on and continued the rest of the lesson, including a canter at the end, so that's good!

Snap

Life is a bone. Sometimes it is going to get broken. Treat it right and it will grow back stronger than ever. Treat it wrong and you will bear the scars forever.

Hanging On The Telephone

I have followed the Sachsgate episode with only mild interest. I think it is very much a storm in a teacup. That doesn't mean I think that the call was right. It was certainly insulting. But I really think that it was an issue between individuals and should never have become the great public fiasco that it has developed into.

The BBC have apologised that this episode came so far below the audiences expectations. That isn't actually true. Of the people listening that night only 2 people complained. Those I have spoken to who are fans of the pragramme said it was funny, even if in bad taste. The complaints have come from people who never even listen to the programme and who don't like Brand or Ross anyway. It has simply turned into an opportunity for those who dislike them, their humour, and what they represent to have a go at them in the "told you so" kind of way. People hate Ross because he is paid ridiculous amounts of money, well, to be fair, that isn't his fault. If someone wants to give him loads of money why should he say no. It is the same as footballers, I don't think that they should be paid as much as they are, but I don't blame them for taking it. And Brand simply makes people feel uncomfortable, they don't know what to make of him, and our response to what we don't understand is to get defensive.

I don't like what they did. But it is what they are paid for, to be spontaneous and to break the boundaries.

All Ears

I love overhearing conversations. In the spa yesterday a girl said to her other half "let's go in there, I bet it's freezing". It took everything I had in me to refrain from saying "well doh, that's why it's called the ice cave".

In A Word

An interesting snippet of information (or at least I thought so). I hadn't realised that the word "wild" was derived from "willed, ie a wild animal has its own will.

And The Winner Is...

I am sure that I am allowed to mention the fact that I was at the Farmers Weekly awards last night (even though it's work, and as long as I promise to kill you afterwards). We are one of the sponsors so attendance is a must. I have never been before and I have to admit I was surprised by the amount of glitz. It was like a mini Oscars. A lot of music, lights, celebrities (Clare Balding and John Torode) and entertainment. As well as food and wine of course.

My favourite bit of the evening was the comedy provided by Rainer Hersch. If you ever get a chance to see him then I urge you to do so. The only problem was that his stint was too short. He needed to ahve at least an hour. Absolutely hilarious stuff.

What To Wear?

McCain must be regretting his choice of Palin as a running mate by now. Not that we are, too much entertainment, but if he thought he would make things more stable he was wrong. The idea of bringing in some youth to counter his grey hair, and a female to get the Hilary vote could still backfire. But as it backfires it will also bring a potential smile to our faces.

The revelation that this hockey mum has spent $150k on clothing does nothing to reflect the "in touch" feel that they were after. And I rather like the Republican excuse that a third has been returned which, it then transpires, is purely because it was the wrong size. As repossesions are on the increase and peoples savings are cut down by the credit crunch, there is some pain in hearing that a nominee has spent more than a mortgage on clothes alone. The smile has a certain degree of irony to it, but there is a smile none the less.

Fire, Fire

Gabriella Cimli - Sweet About Me

The Look - I Am The Beat

Chris de Burgh - Transmission Ends

What's It All About

So they have announced that sex education should be compulsory. I do have some problem with this. It isn't a moral problem or anything. And it is possible that I am looking at this at too superficial a level. But, it seems to me, as sex education has increased so have the problems with teenage pregnancy etc. I am not sure that education helps. In fact I am convinced it doesn't. I think that all that is happening is that we are telling children what they can do at an earlier and earlier age. By telling them about it we are inviting them to experiment. The two things seems completely linked to me. We need to let our children be children. 7 year olds being taught about intercourse, this seems ridiculous. And don't say this is what they are exposed to already, at this age they aren't. But once school exposes them to it then of course they will want to know more about what the teachers taught them. We are making children grow up too quickly.

One Way Or Another

"Thought for the Day" on Radio 4 this morning was about excelling at something. Apparently to excel you need to dedicate 10000 hours to your sport, music or whatever. A lot of your life. And I was thinking it is strange, society wants us to try and excel, excelling is seen as a virtue, and yet society also expects us to undersand that life is about family. These two paradigms are diametrically opposed to one another. Those who excel often later talk about how much they sacrificed. And a lot of what they sacrificed was those around them. They become heroes in society and at the same time ignore all those things that can give them personal value.

Wadyasay

How would you pronounce this student’s name: “Le-a”?

Leah? NO
Lee - A? NOPE
Lay - a? NO WAY
Lei? Guess Again.

It’s pronounced “Ledasha.” Oh, yes, you read it right. This child attends a school in Livingston Parish, LA. Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong. If you see something come across your desk like this, please remember to pronounce it correctly.

I just couldn't work it out. How does Le-a sound like Ledasha? I could see no way to get from one to the other. Now see below for the answer:

When the mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, “The dash don’t be silent.”

Mental Block

I don't know if you have been watching "Greatest Cities of the World" with Griff Rhys Jones. I am a little behind with it, so only just watched last weeks where he was in London. It is an interesting series. Despite being slow it is interesting and, possibly because of its speed, relaxing. It could be manic but instead is a leisurely look around the city. But I did find one segment concerning. Griff spent some of the day playing on the stock exchange. Those he met there were as fast and furious as you might expect, shiffling millions of pounds around in seconds. Later the same day Griff went to a boxing club, and the sme people were there, not as spectators but as contestants. So these people who are responsible for the countries economy are happily destroying each others brain cells every evening. And we wonder why there is a crisis!

Two Packets of Crisps

After a while, as a parent you get used to being a source of disappointment for your child. For instance, today we went to Woburn Safari Park, I recounted a story of when I had to stitch a lions tail after it had been in a fight. You'd think that that should be reasonably impressive. No, I got a tut for not being able to remember if it was a daddy lion or a mummy lion. Anyway, it's bad enough when it is your own child. But the School Council, which is a body of children elected by their class mates (and remember this is primary school) have sent a message to all parents that they are disappointed in the snacks being sent in lunch boxes. Apparently the snacks aren't healthy enough. Yes, that's right, we are being told off by children for giving them nice things to eat!

Banged Up

It is unfortunate that Michelle comes from Rutland. It probably didn't help her case the moment she said that in court.

Formula One (Over)

A fast moving man was old Tony. So fast it was easy to miss him misleading everyone.

Equus

I had another riding lesson today. And boy, don't my legs know about it. When I dismounted I nearly fell over, my thighs and knees have suffered. But I spent most of the time laughing. Why you may ask (go on, ask, you know you want to).

Well, although I can't recount all the stories from earlier this week, I see no harm in saying we were in Portugal in a town called Golega, the Capital of the Horse. I don't know if you have ever seen a Lusitano stallion. Absolutely beautiful beasts. And we went to the Portugese School of Equestrian Art. Now for those not quite in the know, that isn't a museum with loads of horse paintings, that is where you go to see stallions being ridden with some of the best control you will ever have the priviledge of witnessing.

So, having seen this I was acutely aware of my rather feeble efforts. Hence a lot of laughing.

Golden Boy

It never rains on Mandelsons parade does it? Even when he resigns things still work ot for him. Resigning twice from UK Government he still got a handsome job in the EU. Then he is brought back by someone desperate to shore up his reputation (Brown if I am not clear here) meaning he has to resign from the EU. And for his pains he gets a lovely £1 million pay off, coming from tax payers money. OK, it isn't £1 million straight in the pocket, it is made up in a number of ways, but it was his choice to resign. Hell, if I tell my job that I resign tomorrow then they won't be exactly lavishing me with gifts.

On top of everything, Brown had to work out how to bring Mandelson back. So he gets ennobled. Mandelson is to become a Lord.

And why do people think politics a farce.

Colbie Caillat - Bubbly

And for nothing else I am in love with Colbie

Sink or Swim

When is a ship not a ship? When Gordon Brown is Prime Minister apparently. Not the funniest joke, but true. You may find this one hard to track dowwn. In fact if it was April 1st I would think I had imagined it. But "J" saw it as well, on the news this morning.

There has been a long standing arrangement that sailors who are away from home for 8 months a year do not have to pay tax (I believe it was the poll tax but could be corrected). Anyway, the dear old inland revenue have found a loophole. It is simple enough. Reclassify ships as "floating platforms". Suddenly the men on board are no longer sailors and no longer eligeble for the tax break. A nice extra income for the government, on a group of people who won't be noticed.

Visitation

A new preacher was visiting in the homes of his parishioners.

At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer
came to his repeated knocks at the door. Therefore, he took out his
business card and wrote 'Revelation 3:20' on the back of it and stuck it in the door.

When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card
had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, 'Genesis3:10.'
Reaching

for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter.

Revelation 3:20 begins 'Behold, I stand at the door and knock. 'Genesis
3:10 reads, 'I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was
naked.'

Freedom

So after a week of being banished I have relented. It really was impossible to look at the sad little faces pressed against the door. But they have had the riot act read to them. They hopefully realise that should another piece of furniture be ruined then I cannot be held responsible for "J"s actions. House rules have changed, upstairs door kept closed at all times, at night the cats aren't allowed in the sitting room. We will see!

Not Fair

4 days away in Portugal. And I really could regale you with some fantastic stories. From start to finish. real tears to the eyes stuf. But I can't. Because it was work. So you will just have to trust me. Laugh, it was worth it.

Dee Dah

It's no wonder that everyone rubber-necks at accidents on the motorway. I've worked it out. Every child from the moment they are born has to put up with their parents pointing out to them every passing police car, ambulance and fire engine, especially if the blues are going. We are indoctrinated from the outset.

Miaow

Blasted cats. And everything was going so well. But in the last two months we have had three pieces of furniture ruined by pee. And I am rather stuck for a reason why.

It isn't cystitis. As a vet I hope I'd be able to spot that one. Nothing has changed in the house so it shouldn't be stress. The litter trays are in the garage so nice and secluded, and anyway the three pieces of funiture have been in the open so it wasn't that one was wanting to hide away. And it isn't the same place, three pieces of funiture in different places. Litter trays cleaned out regulalry (now twice a day).

All the things I can think of aren't the reason for it. So I am stuck.

Which means the cats are now banned to the conservatory. Which is miserable for them, they stand at the door crying to come in. And is miserable for us, I feel guilty that they are in a cold conservatory, every time we have to go to the garage then we have to sneak in trying not to let them through, and I miss having them in the house and around our feet. And getting rid of them would break "A"s heart, she loves them so much.

The Come-Back Kid

You know, I really don't care how many people think that Peter Mandelson has done an excellent job in the EU. He has had to resign twice. He has repeatedly shown incredible poor judgement. And to bring him back also shows poor judgement. Is there really no-one else that Brown can turn to? Has the barrel really got that low? There is a message there though. Brown and the old guard can see that they are losing their hold, the tenure is slipping. What else can they do but turn to the old team, those that were there at the birth of New Labour?

Biffy Clyro - Mountains

Interesting, the video is set in a masonic temple.