Big Tick

Local elections coming up. I believe it is important to use ones right to vote. And I might surprise you by letting you know I won't be voting conservative. Nope. Going to go Lib Dem. I have always had a mild leaning towards them and this year it has been made easy. They are the only party that have bothered to come around and knock on my door. Unfortunately it was bad timing as I was putting "A" to bed, but the point is they tried. So a brownie point and a vote they do get.

The Pleasure Bean

Today we had a trip to Cadbury World. Both "A" and I were disappointed not to see any Oomp-Loompas, and neither of us felt that we had so much chocolate that we never wanted to see another bar in our lives (actually I was very restrained). None-the-less, not a bad place to spend the day. "A" got to practice tempering chocolate and, to her credit, did not get it all over herself. I would have liked to see more of the factory in action and to understand the whole process better, it wasn't "techy" enough for me, but we managed to avoid having our photo taken, unlike this poor couple.

I think the most amazing thing was realising how liberated and forward thinking the Cadbury family were. They introduced many things for the workforce which, even now, would not be done. They built a swimming pool and it was compulsory for the workforce to spend time learning to swim and time was provided during work hours for this. And, of course, they built Bourneville itself so that their employees were able to live in leafy suburbs rather than smoke filled inner cities. In fact, they were so good, that I think I should buy more chocolate simply to support the workforce.

Sleepless

For the years
We grew
We learnt,
Play
Turned to more,
'Till even dreams
Kept us together.

But minutes
Can be stronger,
Stronger than years.
And in minutes
One word
Can become
One hundred.

And words
Can be stronger,
Stronger than dreams.
And while
Dreams remain,
Where the sun never sets
Days appear
Forever.

Halt In The Name Of The Law

I have only been able to find the following on Radio 4, it was read out on the Friday 6 pm news, about 20 minutes in, so no link I'm afraid.

A Morrisons store in Kilmarnock decided that they needed to find new ways to combat shoplifting. So they had two life-sized cardboard cut-outs of policemen made and erected in the store. Sadly the cut-outs were then nicked. Morrisons have asked for them to be returned.

Sometimes I don't need to try to make something funny.

My Daemon

Below is my Daemon. You may not agree it truely represents me. If you give feedback you may alter my daemon before it settles into its final form. Please do click on the picture and answer the questions as you know me. Thank you.



The following are the changes that my daemon have gone through, edited as changes happen-
My daemon started off as a crow before changing to a silver lynx (modest, solitary, inquisitive, competitive and spontaneous), then to a wolf with the same features, back to the silver lynx, followed by a spider then a stoat (interestingly all have the same descriptive words so I don't know if that is set by my original answers), then back to the wolf (which is good, before this started I would have taken a wolf by choice).

To find your own daemon go to Golden Compass.

The Best School

And so to what did I do last night. I went down to London. And visited the Grand Lodge (just off Drury Lane, Great Queen Street, fantastic building that you may have seen in Spooks or some other programmes). My old school lodge was meeting, the Old Cliftonian Lodge (original name I know). I hadn't managed to get to one of their meetings before but I thought it might be fun. I have to admit to some trepidation beforehand. Would I recognise anyone, would they be people I wanted to meet?

Well, the first thing I realised was that I should have spent the previous 24 hours revising. No-one attempted to check my masonic credentials, but my old school credentials were checked to the full and I think I failed. Who was in your year? Er. Which prep school house were you in? Er. Who was headmaster when you were there? Er. Which house were you in? Oooo, oooo, I know this one, Oakeley's. Who was your housemaster? Er. Was Buffy Smithson there at the time you were? Er. Was Flapper Flint teaching? Er. And so on, ad infinitum. look, it was a long time ago, OK. I swear I was almost thrown out, not because I didn't know the secret handshake but because I couldn't remember Buffy Jones.

It was a good night though. The meeting was an installation which, having been installed two weeks ago myself, was excellent to see. A moment to watch rather than be taking part can be useful in understanding the enormity of what happened. And I was able to tell the new Master that I knew exactly how he felt. And the Festive Board afterwards (basically the meal) was enjoyable, meeting new people and, yes, singing the school song. I possibly didn't treat it with as much reverence as some would have liked, but I enjoyed it which, to my mind, is the important thing (I simply believe that there are times when it is important to smile at yourself). I made some new friends. I improved my Masonic knowledge. And I had a good meal with reasonable wine. Definitely worse ways to spend a night.

Song Time

This is going to be out of synch because I will write the post later about what I was up to last night (although the label will give a clue). Suffice it to say at the moment it was to do with my old school. And we sang the school song. What fun. I am sure I only sang this once while I was at school but it made me smile last night. The song is written by Henry Newbolt, and it is the epitomy of what you could expect a school song to be. The words are below, please read. I have to admit to a disappointment though. A line of the chorus has the words "jolly days", I was rather frowned on for singing the word "jolly" in the same way as certain Greenbelters (yes, you know who you are, and I admit I am one) sing the word "frolic" from Puff the Magic Dragon.

It's good to see the School we knew,
The land of youth and dream,
To greet again the rule we knew
Before we took the stream:
Though long we've missed the sight of her,
Out hearts may not forget;
We've lost the old delight of her,
We keep her honour yet.

Chorus:
We'll honour yet the School we knew,
The best School of all:
We'll honour yet the rule we knew,
Till the last bell call.
For, working days or holidays,
And glad or melancholy days,
They were great days and jolly days
At the best School of all.

The stars and sounding vanities
That half the crowd bewitch,
What are they but inanities
To him that treads the pitch?
And where's the wealth, I'm wondering,
Could buy the cheers that roll
When the last charge goes thundering
Towards the twilight goal?

The men that tanned the hide of us,
Our daily foes and friends,
They shall not lose their pride of us,
Howe'er the journey ends.
Their voice, to us who sing of it,
No more its message bears,
But the round world shall ring of it
And all we are be theirs.

To speak of Fame a venture is,
There's little here can bide,
But we may face the centuries,
And dare the deepening tide:
For though the dust that's part of us,
To dust again be gone,
Yet here shall beat the heart of us -
The School we handed on!

We'll honour yet the School we knew,
The best School of all:
We'll honour yet the rule we knew,
Till the last bell call.
For, working days or holidays,
And glad or melancholy days,
They were great days and jolly days
At the best School of all

Something For The Weekend

I had to pop into the chemist today. I walked in and was instantly greeted by two very nice, attractive, young female assistants. This was very pleasant, having them vying for my attention (OK, look, I know that it was just that I was the first customer they had seen in 15 minutes but I am nearly 40, bear with me, I need to make the most of whatever attention I can get). Anyways, I smiled and started joking with them. All very nice. Then I remembered why I had gone in. There is no way that you can drop the word "imodium" into a conversation and continue flirting (in fact, to tell you the truth, and you probably don't want to know this, I am beginning to think I have irritable bowel syndrome because if it isn't irritable it is certainly d..n annoying.). It would have been so much easier if it had been something innocent like, I don't know, condoms perhaps.

The Official Office

Half way through the morning the window cleaners came in. I hardly ever see them because I am out on the road but today I was in. And before cleaning the inside of my windows they openned the blinds. I felt like I was in a comedy horror (me screaming "bright light, bright light", I just needed someone to spill water on me). I hadn't realised how dark my room was. You see my desk, which is "L" shaped is positioned in the corner so I am facing the window. But opposite my window is a white wall and the sun reflecting off it is very bright. So I have got used to keeping the blinds semi-closed. The wash of sunlight into the room was nice though. I couldn't keep my desk where it was and the blinds open because I was squinting so much I couldn't see anything, so I decided to rearrange the room. As I finished some others walked by and asked me if I had filled in a health and safety form for rearranging the room. For a moment I believed them!

I now face into the room and towards the door so I can see straight up the corridor (ha, hours of fun people watching). But the desk cuts across the room, something I have avoided for 6 years as I feel that a desk can easily feel like a barrier. Not sure about the new layout, yes I have more natural light which has to be good, but my office now feels like, well to be honest, an "office".

I will give it a week then decide if I should go back to the old layout.

Nutty

I so wish I hadn't found this. The Wordsworth Rap. Luckily for you I can't add the video and I strongly advise that you don't go there unless you have a very strong constitution. We have a rapping squirrel, MC Nuts, dancing around the lakes singing a rap version of "I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud". And it is produced by the Cumbrian Tourist Board. They say that 200 years after the poem was written it is still reaching new audiences and inspiring people. This is good. So they decided to do a You-Tube version. This is bad. What would Wordsworth make of lines such as "When all at once I looked down and saw a crowd, And in my path there was a host of golden daffodils, So check it" or "Must have been ten thousand I saw in my retina, No more than a glance then I register they're beautiful etcetera" (honest, in the rap the squirrel sings the word "etcetera" to rhyme with "retina").

And they think it will keep the poem alive for another 200 years. I think they may have just killed it off. MC Nuts is a red squirrel, I think his days might have become even more endangered. The Cumbrian Tourist Board and MC Nuts have definitely not got "respect".

Pleading The 2nd

The Second Amendment to the Bill of Rights makes interesting reading. This is the bit that the gun lobby in the USA use to defend the fact that everyone should be allowed to wander around with guns, everyone has the right to bear arms. But let us look at the entire piece:

A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

Hmm. So it doesn't just say the right of people to bear arms should not be infringed. No. It says a well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state. Is it possible that this was written in another day and age? A time when things were different? Is it actually saying that the people need to be able to defend themselves against a tyranical state? This was written at the time of great upheaval and the emergence of the union. The people had fought to achieve what they had and the amendment was there to ensure that this would not be lost.

I think that the second amendment does not give all civilians the right to bear arms. The amendment describes why it has been added (being necessary to the security of a free state, not for individual security) and it says who (a well regulated militia). There is an answer to all those who wish to bear arms however. They can fulfil the 2nd in its entirity. Your country has an emergency at the moment. It is called Iraq. Anyone who thinks that they have a right to bear arms should go straight down to the recruiting office, you can tell them you are bringing your own gun, and get shipped out to Iraq to become a well regulated militia.

Hmm, you don't want to go? Thought not.

So Fast I'm Giddy

Patricia Hewitt has done a "You Ask The Questions" profile with The Independent. I challenge you to find where she actually answers a question. I am actually moving to a position where I admire her for the flagrant and unashamed spin she puts on things. To lift a couple of the questions:

Inflation is 4.8 per cent. Nurses pay is to rise by 1.9 per cent. How can you justify that? K GRAIN, by email
We will never do anything to take us back to the days of raging inflation and double-digit interest rates. So this year, while we accepted the recommendations of the independent pay review bodies (including 2.5 per cent for nurses), we also decided to stage the pay rises with 1.5 per cent from April and the rest from November.

How will you tackle the crisis in abortion care caused by more doctors opting out? KATE TAYLOR, Hull
The number of abortions being performed has hardly changed year on year - and more abortions are now done earlier in pregnancy.

Revealed

There have to be many men who are grateful to Kiera for the fact that she is willing to go topless in films. And I would almost, almost, think well of her that she is liberated enough to feel willing to be naked. I think people can get too caught up in the naked body. But she rather blows this as she continues with the interview. It is all very well to say how liberating it is but when you then follow up by saying that she will show off her top half but has a body double for her bottom (how do you explain that at a party when asked what you do "I am a bottom double"). This just means that she isn't so much liberated as vain and has certain parts she likes to flaunt.

And, considering how comfortable she is with her top half, you might want to spend a minute or two playing "Spot The Difference" between these two shots from King Arthur, one for the UK and one for the USA.

Dial M For Murder

So when Sal said she would come to an opera with me I suspect this wasn't quite what she was thinking of. But I have to say that Opera Interactive Technology are living up to their name. I haven't quite worked out why they called themselves that, but their story is rapidly turning into a soap opera. And I do like the way that GMTV, and others, are trying to act so innocent. It is possible, and I am really being generous here, to imagine that the presenters knew no better, but there must have been an element of complicity between the two companies. In many ways though the real surprise is that people are shocked that this is happening. The types of questions alone give away the fact that this is really just about making money. I mean, with questions like "Was the hero a) James Bond, b) Inspector Gadget, c) Deputy Dawg?" after you have watched Casino Royale, what can you really expect?

Bobbing Along

Bad Taste Warning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thames Water are, of course, completely right to warn people not to go swimming in the Firth of Forth after the sewage plant pumped 100 million litres of waste into the waters. After all, anyone attempting it would just be going through the motions.

Bricked Up

It is always nice to see how the Americans have managed to learn from history. Taking great successes such as the Berlin Wall and the West Bank Wall and using them as role models, they are now building a Baghdad Wall. And, as can be expected from examining history, it is doing wonders for morale and to bring the communities together. In fact, thinking about it, maybe it will help with the community thing - soon everyone will want the US out.

Notes From Heaven

OK, a bit late reporting this one, but the story is worth telling, and my thanks to Barefoot for finding it. It is certainly an interesting experiment. Place a top rate, world recognised, violinist in an incongruous position, such as at a busy station, and see how many people realise what they are listening to.

It is a long article. If you want to see the video clips then you will need to follow the link as I still don't know how to add video to my blog, but I will summarise.

The Washington Post managed to convince Joshua Bell to play for just under three quarters of an hour during the middle of morning rush hour at a Metro station in Washington DC. They wanted to see what kind of attention he would get and how many people would stop to listen to something that actually would cost a heck of a lot of money to see in a concert hall. The result was not many people stopped. Only a tiny fraction of those going past could spare even a moment of their lives.

But reading the piece I am filled with conflicting thoughts. At first it seems a pity, sad even, that people do not stop. But then consider the pieces he is playing. These are fine pieces, but they are pieces for those who know music, have grown up with music, who understand music. Classical music is a refined taste, like many things you need to start with the basics. And the majority of those walking past haven't had that experience so all they hear is a "scratchy" violin. I have listened to the clips and there are bits that transcend emotion but there are also bits that don't.

So I am not sure what it actually tells us. That many of us are too wrapped up in our own world? Possibly yes. That an internationally recognised genius is only a genius amongst those who understand the field, yes. But actually we could look at the hope of the story. Some did stop, some stood still and listened, some who had never been touched by classical music were touched for a moment.

Would I have stopped? I hope so.

What Time Is It?

I think it might be a long day in this household. I didn't sleep well and ended up getting up too early as I was lying in bed with too many thoughts rushing around my head. Unfortunately, depite best efforts to be quiet, this then woke up "A". I told her it was too early and she should go back to bed but, possibly reasonably, her argument was that I was up so why shouldn't she be. Anyway, this means two people who are both tired and likely to become increasingly both grumpy and tetchy as the day progresses. It started with an argument over whether "we" play the PS2 (me) or we watch channel 621 (her). I think it may get more unreasonable later. Oh joy.

World Cup Cricket

At some point it had to happen. A match that made it worth while. And todays was it. The result doesn't truly tell of the tension. England win by 1 wicket. It sounds fine. But that doesn't tell the little matter of the fact it came down to 2 runs needed off the last two balls with no wicket in hand. Pietersen and Nixon made the difference. Two men who stood up to be counted when it mattered. Amazing match.

The Thin Blue Line

I suspect I may not have helped my neighbours this evening. On the way back from work I was rather surprised to see the road next to ours closed off by the police. A lot of cars parked on the roundabout but no-one in them. Further down the road I could see that the park was cordoned off. All very odd. As I drove up to my house I noticed a car parked opposite with two people in it. I parked in my drive and got out of my car. Almost simultaneously the man and woman in the car got out. Uncanny timing, was it just a co-incidence? They looked at me. And this is where I might not have helped. Rather than smiling at them I stared, possibly quizically, and then broke eye contact and scurried into the house. I don't think I came over as "friendly". Now this might seem odd but my nervous behaviour was rather driven by the fact I thought they were police. Of the serious crime investigating sort. The "we would like to discuss where you were today" sort. I realise that this might sound, in itself, either suspicious or paranoid. But about 10 years ago I was interviewed by the police regarding a murder and I have never quite got over the experience. So, at times, I can feel a little "on edge". This was one of those times and I thought if I got into the house quickly enough then I might be OK.

So exactly why did this not help the neighbours? Well, as I got into our house and tried to surreptitiously peek out of the kitchen window without being spotted I suddenly remembered that the neighbours house was up for sale and it dawned on me that maybe these were people who had, until my odd behaviour, been considering becoming our new neighbours! Hmm, doubt I will be seeing them again anyway.