Ship Ahoy (or No)!

I looked up the definition of asute.  I found "having or showing shrewdness and discernment, especially with respect to one's own concerns".  Which makes HMS Asute's name even more ironic.  Here we have a state of the art nuclear submarine, designed to outmanouvre the keenest of the enemies navy and it can't even get out of the way of an island.  It is supposed to be able to circumnavigate the globe underwater but actually getting underwater seems more of a problem.


It certainly seems that Skye boasts a grudge against the navy as this isn't the first time a sub has run aground there.  Perhaps this is an attempt by scottish nationals to develop their own navy by hijacking some passing submarine.  In fact, quite a few of the navy's subs have had collisions in the last 20 or so years.  Maybe they should be fitted with hazard lights.

Lion Invasion

Northampton has been invaded by lions.  This is wonderful.  Called the Pride of Northampton, 40 lions have been designed by artists to grace oour streets.  Now, there have been a few detractors, those who complain about the money spent, but I see this as a vision, an attempt to scale the heights.

I didn't know this was happening.  On Sunday I went in to town for a jazz night only to find myself confronted with these lions.  And I was so impressed.  They are beautiful and so tactile (and in case you wonder, this was BEFORE I had had a drink).  You are drawn to them and to admire them.  They bring life and colour to the streets.  Things of wonder.

Art is not of value in itself.  Its value is in what it does to your soul, how it makes you feel.  This is a project designed to ift us above ourselves and, as such, I love it.

When The Pigeon Comes Over The Tree....

Somewhat hard to believe, and sparking a thought that maybe India has April Fools day today, it appears that police are currently holding a pigeon under armed guard.  The pigeons rights are being looked after and there is no torture - it is in a locked but air conditioned cell - but the pigeon is being held for spying.  The pigeon was found in a Punjabi districtneighbouring Pakistan.  As the pigeon had a tag with a Pakistani number on it the police immediately lept to the conclusion that it had been sent in on a spying mission.  I've heard of Pigeon Pie before, now we have Pigeon Spy.

Camerons Debate Notes

Flying High

I'm trying to work out if you can be "too cautious" when thinking about flying planes through ash.  After all, if you get it wrong it isn't just your ice-cream dropped on the floor is it!

This is one of those "damned if you do and damned if you don't" things.  A similar thing happened with the FMD outbreak in 2007.  The then CVO was put under massive pressure by the industry to lift movement restrictions, being told that she was too cautious.  She responded and lifted the restrictions, only for a new outbreak a week later and further spread of disease.

Now, especially if I was going to be 30000 ft in the air, I would like to think that people WERE being over cautious.  It seems all very well saying that the planes can cope with small amounts of ash in the air, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it isn't spread evenly up there.  What if there's a thicker cloud of it, the pilot would only know when he hit it.  And past experience has shown that ash CAN take engines out.  So overall, caution seems a good thing.

Soul Mercy

We all do it.  We all buy things on the web without reading all of the user agreement first.  Tick the box to say yes, with a faint nagging feel that it's wrong but not enough to spend the necessary 5 minutes!  Well, on 1st April, if you bought from GameStation then there is a reasonable chance you just gave away your living soul.  Hidden into their terms and conditions was the following:

"By placing an order via this Web site on the first day of the fourth month of the year 2010 Anno Domini, you agree to grant Us a non transferable option to claim, for now and for ever more, your immortal soul. Should We wish to exercise this option, you agree to surrender your immortal soul, and any claim you may have on it, within 5 (five) working days of receiving written notification from gamestation.co.uk or one of its duly authorised minions."

It appears that around 7500 people made purchases on the day.  It seems hardly any contacted the company to say that would rather not surrender their immortal soul.  If you bought from them on that day and you see letters of fire standing six feet tall in front of your house then you ahd better not read them, it won't just be the bailiff.

A Rounded Picture

It looks as though, come June, Sony will be launching a 3D TV. I have never really understood all the fuss about 3D films anyway. I don't think that it adds much to a film and, in fact, the current trend suggests that the film makers get overly distracted with the effects, trying to ensure things come rushing out at you, and forget the virtue of have a good story with strong acting.

So, with little enthusiasm for 3D films you might imagine that I would not be swept away with the idea of a 3D TV. And you would be right. Despite being a gadget freak and loving the up to date toys, this one is not for me. The idea of having to sit in the privacy of my own house and wear stupid glasses does not grab me. And then let's think it through fully. Considering what is on TV. And I have suddenly thought of the election debates and actually having Gordon standing in my living room. Well there's a horror movie for you, right there. And I have never liked horro films.

Bang

While truly sorry for those trying to fly out tomorrow, I have to say I am extremely releived that it was this week and not last.  I would have been very upset not to go to Munster.  It was last Friday at 1100hrs that we flew from Cardiff so we would have been right in it.  Extremely selfish I know.

On Off

Thinking of going for a pee in the middle of the night.  Stop right there.  Apparently it could give you cancer.  So glad that the Daily Mail are on top of this.  I hadn't realised what a risk I was putting myself at.  Now I have to work out whether I want to fall down the stairs in the dark or simply wet the bed.  Except, IT'S NOT TRUE.  The science editor for the Daily Mail should be taken out and shot at dawn for completely misrepresenting some scientific findings.  The University of Leicester have been quick to explain that the report is a load of tosh (scientific term there).  It looks as though going to the toilet for one hour and using a bright light MAY be a risk, but that doesn't describe what most of us do at 3am if we are unfortunate enough to ahve to go, when we stagger to the bathroom, keep our eyes half closed, and get it over with as quickly as possible.  So we can rest easy, go when we want, and not have to wake up to a wet patch.

Big Bang

So, while there remains an outside chance that we have all slipped into an alternate reality, it appears that the Large Hadron Collider is finally a success. It's taken a lot longer than planned but cheering was heard within CERN today as the scientists managed to collide protons at previously unimagined speeds. After all the fuss, including an interesting theory that time travellers were coming back and sabotaging the LHC because success would have destroyed the world (there's a Star Trek sized time paradox if ever I've seen one) and another that God himself was breaking it (presumably in a fit of peak that he didn't have one when he created the universe as it would have been quicker so he could have had a long weekend off rather than just Sunday), it was somewhat uneventful. At least, I'm fairly sure that wasn't a black hole on the M1 thus evening as I returned from work.

Blues and Twos

It is with great disappointment that I heard the news that "The Bill" is to be axed. To be honest, 6 months or so ago then I wouldn't have been at all concerned. But the new format is really good. I started watching The Bill when it was first aired. It was good drama, well thought out, with strong story lines. I continued to watch for probably about 15 years. But gradually it became more and more of a soap rather than a drama. And the more it tried to compete with Eastenders then the worse it became. Eventually it was no longer worth watching. But about 6 months ago they announced that they were changing back to once a week and hour long episodes. Well, there's not much else on TV these days so give it a go I thought. And what I found was that they had gone back to a drama format not a soap. And the new format is good, really good. Stories are complex, and don't always end as you would expect. There is enough connection between episodes, with some story lines going over a couple of weeks. I will actually miss it when it goes.

What a Shock

This, getting people to deliver electric shocks to other, is not actually new. It is a repeat of a psychology experiment done back in the 60's. It was done in order to explain how Nazis committed atrocities and sows how the human mind can disassociate responsibility when told to do something by an "authority". The study was conducted by Stanley Migram. 65%, yes that's right, 65% of people were willing to deliver what they expected to be a lethal electric shock. What drove them to do it, simply verbal encouragement from a man in a white coat.

So we've known this for 50 years. Why would we even be surprised that people will do the unexpected, perform outside the "norm", when on TV. The television has taken over our world. It tells us what to believe, it shows us what is happening, it provides our pleasure and our grief. It plays with our emotions. So, in this experiment, contestants believe that they are administering shocks to other competitors in order to win a game show. And they do so becasue it is what is asked of them and what they sgned up for. What's possibly more shocking is how we will happily watch programmes that involve pain being done to others. The japanese shows seem to take it further than others, but Total Wipeout is an amazingly big success world wide. Bog Brother is just another variant, it is watched because people suffer.

Many have tried to achieve world domination over the centuries, and failed. The television has succeeded.

Flying High

Honestly, I tried to resist, but after a day of it playing on my mind I can't help it - so those involved with the space shuttle were all flying high then. As if space isn't high enough, someone had to go a it further. Cocaine has been found in a restricted access hanger for the Space Shuttle. Now what really concerns me is if they are careless enough to drop their bag of coke then what else might they have forgotten, someone had better check the wheels are screwed on.

It's A Riot

This is so unfair. There the police were just having some fun and they got in trouble for it. I mean, come on, it's snow, we all should have a kid hidden somewhere inside of us just waiting for snow so you can get out there and throw snowballs or go sledging. And if you have a nearby hill then you HAVE to find the nearest thing at hand that can double as a sledge. I thing using riot shields shows initiative. And just look at how far they go, this is wonderful. I really really really don't think that they should have been admonished. This showed a willingness to be part of the community, to have fun, to share. If anything I think they should have been congratulated.

Odd One Out

So the bookies are finally moving to decimal. Personally I am not a betting man, at least not on the horses, but I am disappointed by this change. Not because it is tradition or anything. But the reason why. It is because younger people can't cope with fractions. Hang on, let's hear that again, yes, when interviewed this morning a spokesman said that people had problems with fractions. What are we teaching in school if people can't do fractions! There seems to be some confusion between the fact that currency went decimal and the fact that they are going to use decimals. This is different use of the word. The fact that currency is decimal does not mean that fractions are no longer relevant. In fact, anyone with a basic understanding of maths is able to work it out for themselves. Education is going to the dogs!

Like Me Like Me Not

The world sometimes amazes me with how ironic it can be without even trying. In the same 7 day period a major rugby star admits to being gay and Uganda introduce laws to make homosexuality a crime which can even carry the death sentence.

It is a mark of how far society has moved on that Gareth Thomas seems to have been besically supported for coming out. Yes, if you go on some forums you can find the gay bashing statements, but the overwhelming line has been that this doesn't affect who he is. And rightly so to. If you respected him before, if you thought he was a good player before, then you should now no matter the label. Of course, if you thought he was a poor player before then again keep your opinions. But don't let a label change how you think.

And then we look at Uganda. Where you can be imprisoned for being gay. In fact you can be imprisoned for not dobbing on someone who is gay (for those not of native english, "dobbing" means telling on and is not a reference to a sexual act!). A country with so many problems and yet they decide to highlight homosexuality. That's putting your head in the sand if anything is.

I've never had any problems with idea of people being gay. Hell, I went to boarding school, it's something that you get used to happening around you! But the thing that proves it for me was something I discovered when I was at vet school. You see, it turns out that there are "gay" bulls, "gay" stallions, "gay" rams. It is natural. It happens. It is not odd, we are designed so that a proportion like the same sex. It's just how it is.

The Worlds ???Favourite??? Airline

If you want to get people on your side then striking over Christmas does not seem the best way to go about it. But that is just what BA cabin crew are doing, affecting up to 1 million people, from December 22nd to January 2nd.

Apparently BA staff are paid twice as much as Virgin Airlines. Now, I don't know about the airline industry, but a general rule seems to be that Virgin pay their staff well, so I assume that BA staff are on a very good deal. It appears that the cabin service director of a long haul flight earns £56k a year. Is it any surprise then that BA feel they need to reduce the number of cabin crew. It would seem to be that or to reduce pay. BA are losing money, they need to do something.

At least one occassional reader of this blog will probably come back at me on this, but I have never understood stirke action. Take a beleagured company and make life even harder for it, yes that sounds such a good idea. In the case of BA, a company that is floundering will now have a high percentage of its customers driven away to other airlines. People who have lost their savings and not been able to go on a long anticipated holiday will not fly BA again. Business men will think twice of flying with BA if there is a risk that they might strike. So BA is plunged into further troubles. In the case of Corus, they need to close a plant because it isn't making money. Striking will cause the company more problems and then lead to increased threat to other jobs elsewhere in other plants.

They say that there is no such thing as a free lunch. Well there is also no such thing as a free strike. Those striking, and their colleagues, will always end up paying in the long run.

Bang

The media can be very misleading. A story running on the BBC this morning is that a man has been shot in Manchester for a laptop. This has the effect of making you think "gosh, scary world, where you can be shot for something so small with such a low market value". The story is running on the tickertape at the bottom of the screen and was mentioned four times in ten minutes. Only once did they explain the entire story, which is that the man was shot for £10k and a laptop. A very different story. In fact the laptop is probably a complete red herring. This is a fine example of just how the media presents the world in a scary, frightening manner in order that we all feel insecure. Why would they do that? Because it makes you watch more news, you want to be sure that the ravening hordes aren't coming down your street.

Cheese

I cannot believe that it is Wallace and Gromit 20th anniversary. I feel old all of a sudden.

Ask Not

I am no lover of the BNP or of Nick Griffin. I fact I find them fairly abhorrent. However I don't think that the BBC can be criticised for having him on Question Time. They have been condemned for giving him credence, for acknowledging him. Unfortunately the system has already done that. It wasn't the BBC. If it is legal for the BNP to run in elections, if the BNP can have members voted successfully as MEPs, then we have to recognise them. We can ask oourselves why, we can wonder why lessons haven't been learned previously, we can despair. But we have to open our eyes and see that people are voting for them. We have to see that somewhere our society is messing up so badly that ordinary people think that it is right and necessary to give their vote to the hatred.

The BBC has helped us face up to our fears. This is correct, we should not bury our heads in the sand. We cannot ignore what is happening. But we can expose it for what it is and remove the gloss that lies over it.