Fine Idea

I am slightly surprised that this seems to be slipping past wqithut anyone noticing. But, then again, this government are masters at sneaking through things without being up front. It appears that victims of assault and violent crime are to receive less compensation if they have been convicted of speeding. For instance, a rape victim will receive £37500 less if they have points on their licence. This is all in a move to save the government £25 million in compensation. It even stretches to murder, so a parent of a murdered child will receive less compensation if they have been fined in the last 5 years. Now, I in no way think monetary compensation is going to do anything to relieve the pain a parent would be going through, but this seems to just add insult to injury.

It is hard to express how shocked I am by this. The two things are so totally unrelated. How can anyone argue that someone who has been attacked and paralysed deserves less money just because they were caught speeding in the past. There is no justice in this, it is not fair. It is simply picking on an identifiable group. This is a despicable and cruel policy that shows the level of this governments inhumanity.

{I would like to point out that, while I have been caught speeding in my past, I currently have a clean licence. Although once the Audi A5 arrives......}

Dark Times

Phillip Pullman has been complaining recently that authors need to be CRB checked before they can go into schools. He thinks this is a terrible thing. Well, putting aside the fact that I believe that anything stopping Pullman meeting children is a good thing, I couldn't disagree more.

First off, let me address my issues with Pullamn personally. It isn't that he has written anti-Christian books that worries me. I think debate is a good thing and I generally welcome anything that will challenge beliefs. After all, it is only by being challenged that we can grow stronger. No, it is the way he does it. I have read "The Dark Materials" trilogy, and I found it a completely dishonest and subversive way to get a message across. He only owns up to his position, which is anti-god, very near the end. You are drawn into a story which later turns out to be a lecture. And I don't think that that is the right approach. Be open, ask the questions, make people think about what they believe. But don't mislead them.

So, having got past that, should childrens authors be checked? Well, as someone who generally says that children are too protected these days, I would have to say that this is actually the right approach for once. Childrens authors are like heroes in the school. If you meet someone who writes the books that you enjoy then you would be willing to walk through fire for them. It is an incredibly powerful position. It is only right that we should check that the power isn't going to be abused. A good author commands more respect than a sportsman when you are talking about young children. Someone who can talk to them at a level they understand, can appear to know what is happening to them and write about it, is going to achieve an almost god-like status (hmm, some irony there possibly). And with things like Facebook a single meeting can develop into more. So, don't wrap children in cotton wool, don't take them out of school because of a single case of swine flu, but do check that those in powerful positions are fully checked.

Cash Point

There seems to be a rather neat fix to the "cash for peerage" problem. As the government are no longer to give away seats in the House of Lords for money they seem to have found a different route for getting those they like in there. You have to wonder if less than two years service is really enough to qualify for a lifelong position don't you. The idea of the Goats (government of all talents) was a dubious one anyway, a clever way to get people into power without them ever being elected, and a way to skew the votes to favour Labour. But they should have at least had a contract with a minimum service period. If you are going to get a peerage then I want you to work for at least 5 years for the country, if not ten. Did Lord Darzi not think that being a minister and also remaining a doctor might just be a little difficult and possibly, just possibly, over-committing. Very nice that he now wants to give his patients some time, but indicating a certain short-sightedness than is worrying in someone who could wield a scalpel.

{Sorry, a bit late picking up on this one, but I have been away for a few days}

Who threw that - assegai

I'm quite used to sitting watching the South Wales Borderers singing "Men of Harlech" as the waves of zulus come charging over the plains. It brings tears to my eyes. Within a period of 24 hours the British army saw one of their greatest defeats and one of their greatest victories. No one battle ahs ever had more VCs awarded than Rorke's Drift. Men stood tall, and they did it for each other. Sure, they never really sang "Men of Harlech" (this version sung in the chapel at Rorke's Drift by the RoyalRegiment of Wales), but I wish they had. 150 men against 4000, defending a small supply station with Martini-Henry rifles and a lot of guts.

I am not sure that "pool of Harlech" has quite the same ring to it. But it has been a fight none-the-less. The swimming pool in Harlech has been under threat of closure for over a year. And it was down to the wire (should that be lane), the end of this month would have seen the doors locked for the last time. But a group has been fighting the council in order to keep it open and, great news, Gwynedd council have accepted their proposal today.

This is a Welsh swimming pool, although there are some foreigners in it mind.

{And yes, before someone points it out, I know that they weren't the South Wales Borderers until 2 years after the war}

{And if you don't understand the title then you need to listen to some Max Boyce}

F***** B****** S*******

Next time I am caught swearing I can at least justify it. It isn't simply me being mindless, swearing serves a function. It appears that using bad words can actually increase your pain threshold. I often think that it is strange that the swear words we use are generally derived from either normal bodily functions or, even more strange, the physical act of sex, which is generally an enjoyable thing. But the one thing they have in common is the amount of force that you can get behind the words. It appears that these test subjects were asked to either repeatedly use a swear word or a word to describe a table when in a situation of pain (hand plunged in ise water). I can understand that the use of f*** is going to be rather more cathartic than the use of "regency". And they managed to keep their hand in the water for longer when using the swear word.

I think I am going to introduce a "freedom to swear" day at work.

Technorush

I may be accused of being a glutton for punishment. As I write this on my old computer because the new Water Dragon has completely fallen over, while this one has only partially fallen over, I have gone out and bought a laptop today. Now, to be fair, the laptop isn't for me, it's for my daughter. And I am not entirely convinced that buying a laptop for a 7 year old is a sensible decision. However, we just had her SATs results and the end of year report. I am not going to give scores, but let me say (as a proud father) she has done extremely well. And what impresses me as much, if not more so, than the results is that the report says how helpful she is, that she shares her ideas, shows others how to do things when they are stuck etc. While I may not exactly recognise the girl who, with us, is often a bad loser, I am very happy to have a report that says what a pleasure she is to have in the class. So I told her she could have a present. Bless her, her opening gambit was to go to the cinema. Which is lovely but not really as big as I was thinking. Then, from mummy, came the idea of a TV for her room. I was a bit reticent about this, I think she watches enough TV anyway. So I suggested a laptop, she loves playing online games, she loves using Powerpoint (at seven I think she can write better presentations than some of the people I work with), and a computer can be educational as well. It seemed a good (albeit expensive) option, and "A" was eager. So we went in to Comet and bought an off the shelf one. Which, despite my loading on things like Microsoft Office and basically fiddling, is still working 10 hours later.

Which leaves me with two desktops, two laptops, an iPhone, 4 iPods and an iPAQ. Hmm, gadget overload.

In The Head

A somewhat curious observation made tonight. When I go to Whittlebury Hall spa the women outnumber the men by a ratio of approximately ten to one. And yet in the spa at the gym it is the other way around. It isn't that women don't use the gym, although it isn't quite 50:50. But clearly a greater proportion don't use the spa facilities. There isn't really a lot of difference between the two places so this must be a psychological thing. For the men going down the gym is manly so anything associated with it must also be so, but a spa club is "girly". For the women a hotel spa facility is feminine while the gym has too much testosterone. It's amazing what location can do to something and how it can change perception.

Under Pressure

OK, here's a piece of advice should you ever need it. When at the gym, if you have had a good session, don't ask them to increase the levels on all your equipment in one go! Last night that is exactly what I did. And today wasn't pretty. I tried to get them to swap me off the treadmill, which I detest almost as much as computers (dong this blog on my iPhone as my new computer is so unstable as to be almost unusable), and my attempt was in the vein of "I can't run on the treadmill as my shins can't take it so I am not sure I get enough exercise on it". Their response was to leave me on the treadmill but to increase the incline. But without thinking I asked them to increase everything else.

As it is, the treadmill on an incline is knackering. So when I moved to the hand bike I was feeling as though I was running on empty. And the one I normally use, standing up, was occupied so I used a sittting one which is clearly a different angle. Result was that I struggled. Then I found another problem. I use constant power settings. Normally with the hand bike I have a good momentum going before it piles on the pressure. But I was so tired I lost momentum. So much so that I stopped for a few seconds. Only to discover that it increased the resistance so much that I couldn't get going again. Not my best look really, sweat pouring down my face, mouthing swear words, and most clearly absolutely and utterly stuck.

I was so tired by the end that I almost didn't have the energy to use the sauna.

Gurgle Gurgle

Health and Safety. It's enough to strike fear into anyone. In a world gone mad the H&S people take the biscuit. Or, in this case, the water wings! What am I going on about? A school has banned swimming goggles because they could snap back and hurt a child. I would be really interested to see the statistics showing just how much of a risk this is. And do we not think that maybe teaching the children how to put on and take off the goggles might be better than simply banning them. At some point we have to trust people to take responsibilty for themselves. The more we encourage this nannyism then the less people think. The way to deal with it is not to say "there there let us take the risk out of your life" because finally people will be surprised that stepping off a cliff killed them, and there will be outcry to ban all cliffs. No, we need to say "what, it hurt, so what did you learn about that then and what are YOU going to do in the future, what have YOU learnt". Empower people, let them be responsible for their own lives, adn you might be surprised how much more you can get out of people.

Bang

There is something vaguely disconcerting about finding yourself in a hotel that supplies ear
plugs on the bedside table. I mean, what do they know. Why do they come with the not so cryptic message -we wish you a good nights sleep? Am I only going to get a good nights sleep if I use them? Do the bin men come at an early hour? Are
they expecting an RAF fly past? Are the neighbours screamers? All very worrying.

As it was there was nothing. At least nothing more than the usual nature getting on with life and the occasional car passing. I know this be wise I lay awake waiting for whatever the big noise was going to be. The big noise that never came!

A Final Roar

It's the third, and last, test for the Lions against South Africa. They have already lost the series. Importantly they have also lost a large number of key players. And yet, when the cards are finally dealt, they come out with every intention of winning. And they do. Emphatically. Considering the other two matches went to the last whistle, this is the most convincing play by either of the teams. In fact on total points, and on tries scored, the Lions actually win. However, that's statistics, South Africa won the test and we can't take that away from them. Some players today really showed their mettle. I won't ever understand why Martyn Williams didn't start the other two matches, today he was inspirational, always there and in the thick of it. Only really eclipsed by Mike Phillips who controlled the game as scrum half and then stood tall when he was moved out to centre.

Three fantastic amtches. The Lions are not a spent force, they have a role to play in the modern game. And they were so close to winning it all.

Deuce

It was almost predictable wasn't it. The hype just got so high. It's as though we never learnt from Henman. Whats almost more amazing is that The Telegraph manages to turn this into a bad thing for Roddick. Now, I'm no tennis fan, and I have to admit to only watching because I don't like Murray and wanted to see him beaten, but it seems to me to be extemely unlikely that Roddick could be sorry to have beaten Murray, no matter how often he has lost to Federer. The media are strange. A week ago they had Murray through to the final, despite the distance to go. They even managed to forget the match a few days ago when he was taken to the line. This morning they were talking about a man on top of his form, but this is a man who was lucky to get this far after nearly being unseated by Wawrinka. And with Roddick they are already writing him up as losing the final. Time to let them get on with playing.

The Full Monty

Dress down Friday is one thing, but dress off Friday quite another. I am sorry, but there are quite a few of my work colleagues that I really, really wouldn't want to see naked. And they would feel the same about me. Team building events are bad enough, having to all muck in and build a raft, or see how many balloons you can hold between your legs, but this is a team getting too close and intimate. Why do I feel that David Taylor, the one who came up with the idea, was really doing it for a bet. I suspect that one evening down the pub he told his mates that he could get anyone to take their clothes off for him and that they would pay him obscene amounts for the priviledge. So the next job was a poor unsuspecting lot from Newcastle, and the next thing they know is that their "things" are receiving rather excessive attention.

Room With A View

When you hear that a conference is going to be at somewhere called "Eynsham Hall" I think you automatically imagine a rather grand place. This is emphasised, when you get there, by the long drive leading to a rather grand house with more windows than I have had hot dinners. What you don't therefore expect is for the first two colleagues you meet to tell you that they had to request different rooms. One because he found frogs in his (both live and dead), and the other because brown gloop came out of the taps rather than water. Having heard this I wasn't expecting much from my room but finding that the shower didn't work (and no bath) did not make my day. I told reception that I would put up with it for one night but I wanted to be moved the next day. This should not be too difficult as a number of people weren't staying after we had booked rooms for them.

The next morning I went and reiterated my request. Their opening gambit was that the duty manager had fixed the shower the night before. Thi answered one question, I had been wondering where the dirty footprints in my room had come from, as I was certain my feet had not been that muddy the previous night. However, I felt that they had a different definition of "fixed" than I had. As far as I was concerned, the dribble that came from the shower head did not indicate "working". So their next gambit was to say that they didn't have any better rooms to move me to. At this point, and with others around, I did rather go down the mean route and said "well if that's the best room you ahve then I'd hate to see your worst". I followed with explaining why this was not good enough. When I came back in the afternoon I had been moved. And I was in the main building (so a bigger room) and on the first floor (so no frogs). At this point I accepted where I was. I am loathed to defend them too much though, so have to point out that there were holes in the side of the bath and the shower rail.

If the hotel inspector called I somehow don't think she would be impressed.

Quack

It has been an incredibly "english" day. Around us all the villages have started vying for attention now that summer is here. So they all start to put on fete and events. One local town, Olney, had their annual duck race and raft race. The duck race is first and is a way to raise some money for the scouts. Simply put, you buy a raffle ticket but rather than a straight draw the ticket numbers are painted on to rubber ducks, whcih are all then thrown in the River Ouse and the first to reach the bridge is the winner. There were over 1100 entries this year. And we came second - go us!

Then the raft race - a number of slightly deranged people build a raft, dress up in fancy dress and paddle down the river. And this isn't a short race, they have to go a long way. About half way along they have to go under a bridge, which is lined with people armed with water pisotls, flour and eggs. It's all rather cruel. At the end there is a bit of a party going on, live music, vintage cars, bouncy castle, ice cream van, and in the background a game of cricket. Throw in a morris dancer and it couldn't have got more english!

Mad dogs and englishmen go out in the midday sun. Well, we were all there.

Fantasy?

You say you don't believe,
Don't believe in unicorns,
In the pot of gold
At the end of the rainbow.
You've never seen
A dragon in flight,
Or a choir of elves
Singing to the skies.

But within me
The dragon lives,
In my soul, giving fire,
My ears hear song
That lifts me high,
I found the gold
(and lost it, I know),
And one day,
One heart stopping day,
I will see
The unicorn
In front of me.

Backwards

Finally watched the last episode of "Ashes to Ashes" tonight. A strange series. In many ways enjoyable. But would have been so much better if it had just been a straight cop drama. The flash forwards and mysterious "caught back in time" bit of the storyline didn't just not work, it actually spoilt the story. OK, so I have to overlook the fact that the Masons were rather picked on (and I admit that back in the 80's there may well have been some corruption anyway). But the music was good, and the starring car was the forerunner of what I have just ordered (I think the A5 is descended from the Quattro!). Philip Glenister as Gene Hunt was excellent. Not really happy with the ending, again, the bullet in the brain part of the story letting down the otherwise great acting.

Money Bags

As a race you do sometimes have to question our learning ability. Stephen Hester, CEO or the Royal Bank of Scotland, is on a potential £9.6 million award. Banks have been seen to be rather careless with their money, and there are already rightful questions about how much tax payer money is tied in to the RBS. So, when people are losing jobs and strggling to make ends meet, it seems a bit insulting to offer so much of our money to one man.

Head Down

A weekend spent working on the Water Dragon. The new computer had been delivered during the week while I was away so I needed to get it set up. And it has taken quite a while. In fact still an ongoing process. The main thing left now is restoring missing links for photos in Lightroom, and a few minor discrepencies in iTunes. A bit of a problem with the on-board soundcard but I had a spare Soundblaster Extreme Audio card which seems to be working fine. It will be worth it in the long run, but maybe I should have spent more time with my daughter seeing as I had been away for so long.

Slippery Stuff

Is there something important to know about pride? Yes, that's it, it is closely associated with the great banana skin on the path of life. Now, recently I have done some presentations at some big meetings, and I have been filming for Sky again. And the fact that people kept telling me that I am actually quite good was rather going to my head. To be fair, I realised this and was thinking I had better be careful. Unfortunately it appears that thinking you should be careful and actually being careful turn out to be completely different things. So there I was yesterday ready to give a talk to an international group. I had been playing around with the presentation the night before as I wanted to add a few of my own photos to showcase (OK, so double problem here, rather proud of some of my photos as well). Not that the presentation was about photography, but I was able to add some of my sheep and cattle photos. That morning I had brought in my memory stick and transfered the presentation over to the main computer. I started off with my presentation, and briefly thought my agenda on the first screen was slightly longer than I meant, but I continued on. I hit a series of slides which, while roughly appropriate, I had thought I had taken out. I continued. I got to the final slide and then announced to the group something along the lines of "damn, you know what, I just gave you the wrong presentation". I had suddenly realised that I had just run the entire way through the presentation written for the International Sheep Congress the week before. Both had been on Bluetongue which was why I had been able to continue, and why it came out of my mouth so smoothly, but the take home messages of the two talks were supposed to be extremely different. I had completely failed to cover the particular points required for the meeting. Which would rather explain why people had been looking at my print outs with confusion (the print outs had been taken from the earlier version without my photos and so were correct). While I rescued the situation by going through the print out and discussing the important missed slides I have to say that I was fairly mortified as I have NEVER done that before.

A few lessons to learn, along with don't be proud. Firstly, as part of the title include the name of the meeting the talk is intended for. Both presentations had very similar names hence I had managed to transfer the wrong one. Secondly, run through the presentation quickly once transfering it. This I usually do but didn't in this case because we couldn't see how to blank the projector in the room and I was too cocky to worry about it. Thirdly, should I start thinking that the presentation has the wrong slide in it then I should listen to myself rather than blithely charging onward. And fourthly, there's nothing like a good cock up to bring you sharply back down to earth.

Sparks Fly

Despite l1z suggesting that my source of computers might be the root of my problem, I have to say I think she is wrong. I have had Evesham, Gateway and HP computers in the past. Then I bought one from the local computer shop. They all went wrong so I may as well try something as joyously named as Yoyotech Water Dragon.

However it is possible that a clue for my destructive ability with computers can be found at the gym. In between each piece of equipment I go to take a drink. We have some of those water fountains that I last saw at school. Big metal things with a button to press that shoots water into the air. Which is fine at the beginning, but by the end of a session it is hard to keep the head still and the water goes up the nose. But, and here's the important part, I almost invariably get an electric shock from whichever one I go and use. Thinking about it I also often get electric socks from the cats. And from metal hand rails. Is there a common theme. Doh, yes, me. Maybe, just maybe, I am supercharged!

Get Carter

Or, more accurately, Karta. Karta is an orangutan at Adelaide Zoo. It seems that on Mothers Day she decided that she wanted a different perspective on things. So she stuck a branch into the electric fence, thus shorting it. Then she used shrubs, bushes and branches to build a ladder. She climbed up the ladder and out of the enclosure. After spending some time on top of the wall, basically long enough for the zoo to be evacuated, she then calmly returned to her pen. More a grand day out than the great escape!

Fired

I'd have to say that the more I watch "The Apprentice" the more I decide I do not want to buy anything that Alan Sugar is involved with. I don't think he does himself or his business any favours. The end impression is that he favours cheap and tacky over quality. There is no weighting towards repeat business or trust. Get a quick cheap sale and run like heck is the message consistently received. The sandwich episode was a case in point, the team than won made the most profit but no-one would have ever have bought another sandwich from them again, the quality was so poor that reputation was blown. And tonights winner made chocolates that made people gag. Yes they were cheap, but it showed on peoples faces just how cheap they were. It is all short term focus. You know what, those who considered quality as important are just too good for him, and they should be grateful they didn't get the job. They would have been dragged down to the lowest denominator.

In the RAW

The new computer is ordered. This is good news. {Although, going off on a tangent, caused me some card issues. I ordered it using a credit card. But when I first tried to put it through the transaction was blocked. Apparently the fraud team were a bit nervous. I rang them up and they asked the necessary questions. I said that the amount was right and then they said who it was being paid to. Bearing in mind this is a computer I was therefore a bit surprised when the company showing the transaction was Chalston Motor Homes! After a bit of a panic we cleared it all up and everything went OK. Until today and trying to pay for the riding lesson, when my card was blocked again. Ringing up the fraud squad again it appears they had spotted the transaction again and once again were panicking, mainly because the name of the company had changed to the correct one rather than anyone trying to deal in motor homes. We cleared up the confusion and life returns to normal.}

Anyway, tangent over. Yes, good news. but in the meantime while waiting for delivery I have to try and sort out my files. Which means I realise I have a lot of photos on file. In RAW format (photographing in RAW leaves more flexibility for image manipulation later), so they ain't small, in fact almost 30gB of data. So I now have to transfer them all on to the new external hard drive that I have bought for image storage (the new computer will have only one hard drive which will be used for programs type information). And I also need to redesign my folder categories, the simple by date structure was becoming too cumbersome. Finally, once all of that is built, I then have to restore all the links for Lightroom so that it can find the photos.

I might be some time!

Missed

Looking at the ballot papers yesterday what really amazed me was how many different names there were to put my cross against. Not amazed because it showed that politics was alive and well. No, I was amazed because none of them, not one, had knocked on our door to tell us what they stood for. And if you don't tell people what you stand for then how on earth do you expect to get a vote. For all I know some of the small groups may have had some good points, I may have felt that they deserve a voice. But if I don't know what their platform is then I am not going to stop my train there.

Creating a Splash

I am so pleased that Boris is in this world. Surrounded by politicians that take themselves too seriously and the public not seriously enough, Boris bucks the trend. He is able to laugh at himself (well he has to, so many things happen to him) while he does seem to genuinely care. Never worried about being correct, he is worried about doing right. And he really seems to enjoy being mayor (you can follow his reports on Facebook, they are wonderful reading). Anyway, it had to be Boris that found the hole to put his foot in when wading through a river.

Stop

There is a certain irony that, in a world where people with nothing to say are desperately searching for their 15 minutes of fame, today is the anniversary of a crushed attempt at democracy. The irony is that the defining image of Tiananmen Square is that of a man standing in front of a tank, trying to turn it back. While here we have people trying to show themselves off on "Britains Got Talent", "Big Brother" (back this week), "The Apprentice" and a host of other reality shows. And yet that man, with what appeared initially a futile gesture after so many deaths the day before, is only known as "Tank Man". No-one knows who he was, what his name was, where he came from, or where he has gone. No-one knows what he shouted at the tank once he had clambered on its roof. No-one knows what it was that gave him the strength to stand there blocking the icon of war and destruction. The gesture was not futile as it gave inspiration, it gave hope. It was not futile because it demonstrated that one individual can rise above the dross. It was the complete opposite of all that reality TV represents. It was a real moment of reality.

Computer Woe

My computer is really not well. It appears that out of the USB ports, the network, and the second hard drive I can have two working at any one time, but not all three. And I don't have the choice, the computer decides as it boots up.

My history with computers is not good. I have got through 5 laptops at work in eight years. At home I get through a desktop computer every 2-3 years. I just seem to burn them out. Not exactly sure why, but computers and I are not compatible.

The thing is that I don't read computer magazines these days so I don't even know what I am now looking for. So I think I will just buy the A list computer in PC Pro. I don't know how good it really is but the name is fantastic - the Yoyotech Water Dragon 3.6

Hot Times

Overheard in the sauna - "Christ it's f......g hot in here"

There's not a lot you can say to that really.

Bedtime Blues

My daughter is 7 this week. Asked what she wanted to do for her birthday party she elected for a sleep over. Now, to be honest, I think that this is a bit young for a sleep over, but the precedent has already been set and it is this years "thing". So yesterday was her party. First off was taking "A" and 4 friends to Hannah Montana. This was probably my starring moment. Not Hannah Montana but the taking of children to the cinema. I have an Audi A6 for a test drive this weekend. I tend to drive quite fast anyway, and the acceleration isn't bad in this car. So they rather enjoyed sitting in the back with the windows down as we tore up duel carriageways and around roundabouts (actually one of them wanted the window closed as she thought she might fall out). Loads of bonus points for me there.

When we got to the cinema I tried to convince the attendent that she wasn't supposed to let middle aged men in to Hannah Montana. I failed. I did take my iPhone with me and the headphones, but somehow I resisted listening to my own music (I may have surfed the web a bit, but credit where it is due please). We then took them to Buddies for tea. And at this point we are doing OK.

The sleep over bit may not have been quite so good. One girl was scared by the ghost stories they were telling each other. I should point out that our house is only 20 years old and in no way scary. I should also point out that this girl watched Coraline, which looks an incredibly scary film to me (well, I mean for 7 year olds, obviously not for me). And Scooby jumped on to my daughters bed, scratching her leg in the process. And.......and.......and. Anyway, they were up and down the stairs like a yoyo until I raised my voice. Even then they kept awake upstairs. In fact, at one point J threatened that I would come up to speak to them and they laughed. Hmm, I clearly need to work on the intimidation factor. In the end they didn't go to sleep until gone 0030 hrs.

Which meant that they were all still asleep when the parents came to pick them up. Rather embarassing. When "A" has been at a sleep over then the next morning they are all fed, watered and packed by the time they are picked up. Ours were still snoring.

I am shattered.

Meeting

What a pleasant night. When life can be hectic, too fast, and sometimes downright difficult, it was great to have time out. My parents came down so that my father could come out to a Chapter meeting with me. I had a few lines to do, not a massive amount, but what I had went well, a relief as I have had so much on my mind that I had found some difficulty in buckling down to learning. And it is very satisfying to deliver lines well, with meaning. Time to meet with people, build new friendships, to share moments with my father - all very valuable to me right now. Recently for a few reasons I have not had the drive, the impetus, I needed for this or indeed much. Changes to my life style, and some decisions in my head, seem to have helped and I feel energised. Which is good because being energised results in enjoying living.

Cast

I'll wrap it up tight
With chains and locks
To hold it
And bury it
Deep
Where, no longer
It tears me
Not wanting to lose
Unable to embrace
For now
I need to place it
Away
And maybe
Just maybe
One day
I will look again
And, no more
Feel the pain
Simply
Happy memories

Drive He Said

In my mind I may have decided, but the test drive was disappointing. The BMW 520 has excellent acceleration, but there is no real "feel" to it. It might be an exec saloon thing, but you kind of just float around. Maybe that is why BMW owners are so annoying, they simply forget that there is anything outside their car. So the BMW 520 no longer seems such a sure bet. Especially since a new car popped up on the list. An Audi A5 Coupe. Now, you may ask if that is a practical car for one with a family. And my reply is - who cares. Sleak, fast, and not something everyone else is going for (the office car park is going to look like a BMW show room soon). I took "A" to see one at the weekend, she said she doesn't mind having only the two doors, no problem getting in and out for her. I think she might have been woo'd by me mentioning the acceleration (0-60 in 3 seconds less than the Mazda 6) (I am lucky having an adrenaline junkie as a daughter). And I reckon I can fit most things in it that I need, it's not as though it is a TT (which is also now on my list but some sense must prevail). Test drive now needed, although in the meantime I will try the Audi A6.

Buzzing

Bees are quite fun little things. They fact that the defy the laws of aerodynamics and gravity adds to their charm. But they are apparently hydrophobes. The are scared of flying over water (digression point - midges get blown over water as aerial plankton, when they are no longer over water they can recognise the reduction in UV light being reflected up at them, so they close their wings and effectively dive-bomb out of the air). SO it's nice to know that something has found a use for the plethora of bridges that seem to have sprung up over the Tyne. Bees in the centre of town commute over the bridges and back in order to find pollen. Personally I always thought the number of bridges rather overkill - there is a limit to how many times you can cross one river - but if it is helping the bees to make their way to some decent flowers then it seems a worth while spend of the tax-payers money.

Gotham

This time we made it to Chester Zoo. After the last attempt when we decided the weather wasn't going to be good enough we were going to be easily dissuaded today. And the weather was good, surprisingly so for a Bank Holiday. Chester is quite a good zoo. A lot of effort being put into environmental enrichment. Doesn't always work, especially with the Jaguars which, although beautiful animals, were showing too much pacing for my liking. Zoos are always a conundrum, they do a lot of good work and support conservation, without some of the research by some of he zoos there would be even more extinct species, but for some of the individual animals they aren't great.

Special mention has to go to the bat cave. Before we went in "A" said she was scared of bats. So you'd think going into a cave where the bats can fly around you would be a disaster. Quite the opposite, by the time we came out she said she liked bats and wanted to go back in. It was fascinating. The bats fly right around you. If you stand still and are quiet then that actually fly up to you and hover right in front of your face. Rather than being the shy things that you imagine them to be, it turns out that they are curious little things. Lovely creatures. As your eyes adjust to the dark you can start to see them hanging from the walls next to you. It was without doubt the best bat display I have seen.

A Crispy Business

If you had spent years studying at law school what would you aspire to. Would you want to lead the lastest murder trial, would you want to be fighting for human rights, would you be trying to reverse great injustice? Or would you be trying to decide if Pringles are a cake or a crisp? It turns out that they are, in fact, crisps. Had you ever questioned that in your mind? They certainly seem to be marketed as crisps. But, for Proctor and Gamble, this is a serious issue. A cake is exempt from VAT. Crisps (and biscuits) are not. So it makes commercial sense to be a cake. A similar thing happened with Jaffa Cakes a few years ago, however they won that one on the grounds that biscuits go soft when they go stale and cakes go hard - Jaffa Cakes go hard ergo they are cakes. For Pringles it was the regularity of the shape and the fact that they are made from a dough that gave them a chance to claim that Pringles aren't crisps. However the judge has decided that there is more than enough "potatoiness" (really not sure of the spelling for that) for them to be crisps. And this is an expensive decision for Proctor and Gamble.

Quacking Up

Overall the expense scandal (? mortgagegate, flippergate) is sad. It undermines the political system as it discredits politicians. However there are moments that have to make you smile. I love that most of the dubious claims are completely on line with any stereotypes that we may hold about each party. Todays is a case in point. Only a conservative MP could be caught with his hands in the till for charging a floating duck island on expenses.

Over or Order

I don't think anything amusing needs to be said. The blog can be as short as his resignation speech. 30 years comes down to 30 seconds, and finally the Speaker sees that he must resign, even if the apology is not forthcoming.

Walls

Looking for my castle
Somewhere to hide to
Somewhere to hold to
With the gates closed
To protect me

Without you here
To let the light in
I will let the dust
Gather round me
Watch armour
Turn to rust
Water stagnate
Curtains fall
From rotten wood

But the walls
Will keep me
Safe

Star Struck

We went to the ROyal Windsor Horse Show today. Must admit that, if we hadn't already pre-purchased tickets, the weather would have put us off. Especially when 10 miles from Windsor visibility on the motorway was less distance than a pig sneeze. Having paid though then we were going to spend at least an hour there. And, luckily, we actually got a lot of sun. Also got covered in a lot of mud, and when I got home I realised that I was rather colder than I had suspected (wearing shorts may not have helped this last point). Overall a good day. Saw plenty of Royals, including the Queen. And saw Robert Lindsay, which was (sorry, I hope this isn't treason) even more exciting to spot. And no, don't worry, we did have more class than to rush up to him for his autograph. But I have admired him since "Citizen Smith" (Wolfie was someone you HAD to look up to when I was young), "GBH" and "Nightingales" so spotting him, and hearing his voice, was a good moment.

PLease Don't Leave Me - Pink

Da da da da, da da da da
Da da da da-da da

I don't know if I can yell any louder
How many time have I kicked you outta here?
Or said something insulting?
da da da da-da
I can be so mean when I wanna be
I am capable of really anything
I can cut you into pieces
When my heart is....broken

Da da da-da da
Please don't leave me
Please don't leave me
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me

How did I become so obnoxious?
What is it with you that makes me act like this?
I've never been this nasty
Can't you tell that this is all just a contest?
The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest
But baby I don't mean it
I mean it, I promise

Da da da-da da
Please don't leave me
Da da da-da da
Please don't leave me
Da da da-da da
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me
[Please Don't Leave Me Lyrics On http://www.elyricsworld.com/ ]
I forgot to say out loud how beautiful you really are to me
I can't be without, you're my perfect little punching bag
And I need you, I'm sorry.

Da da da da, da da da da
da da da da-da da
Please, please don't leave me

Baby please don't leave me
No, don't leave me
Please don't leave me no no no
You say I don't need you but it's always gonna come right back,
It's gonna come right back to this.
Please, don't leave me.
No.
No, don't leave me
Please don't leave me, oh no no no.
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this

Please don't leave me
Please don't leave me

Release

A moment
Within a grasp of heaven
Entirely one
With you
More than sharing
A breath forever
Holding the world
As we hold each other
Immensity of emotion
Focused
To a star point

To pause it
There
And never move on

Weightlessness

The next time I fall
You're not there
To catch me.

Will it go on
Forever.
Eternity
In the void

Least Complicated - Indigo Girls

I sit two stories above the street
Its awful quiet here since love fell asleep
Theres life down below me though
The kids are walking home from school

Some long ago when we were taught
That for whatever kind of puzzle you got
You just stick the right formula in
A solution for every fool

I remember the time when I came so close to you
Sent me skipping my class and running from school
And I bought you that ring cause I never was cool
What makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated

So I just sit up in the house and resist
And not be seen until I cease to exist
A kind of conscientious objection
A kind of dodging the draft

The boy and girl are holding hands on the street
And I dont want to but I think you just wait
Its more than just eye to eye
Learn the things I could never apply

I remember the time when I came so close with you
I let everything go it seemed the only truth
And I bought you that ring, it seemed the thing to do

What makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated
So what makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated

Im just a mirror of a mirror myself
All the things that I do
And the next time I fall Im gonna have to recall
Its isnt love its only something new



I sit two stories above the street
Its awful quiet here since love fell asleep
Theres life down below me though
The kids are walking home from school

Im remember the time when I came so close with you
Sent me skipping my class and running from school
And I bought you that ring cause I never was cool

What makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated
So what makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated
The least complicated
The least complicated

Reduction

Time for another gym update. Sorry, but I am so into it that you have to suffer as well as everyone else. I continue to increase the levels on the machines which is good. Still hate the treadmill. But I am finding an unexpected side effect that will also help the weight. I am eating and drinking less. This is a direct result of the time I end up going. I wait until "A" has gone to bed and then head off. Once I have done the gym and used the sauna/spa (compulsory, as explained previously, as it is the one thing that stops me seizing up) I am not home until gone 2130hrs. And that really is too late for eating. So whereas previously I was cooking meals, with very generous portions, I am now having a couple of slices of toast. Even tonight, when I went on the way back from work as "A" was off trampolining, I didn't feel like a proper meal. In addition I normally don't feel like a glass of wine either (although as I type this I do have a glass of whisky beside me). So over a period of a week I probably drink a bottle of wine less than I used to (OK, I used to have a glass every night, and they are big glasses).

Gosh, I so should have done this a couple of years ago.

I've Been Driving In My Car...

Yesterday down to Wimbourne and back. Today it was Chippenham. That's a lot of driving. But nice weather so quite pleasant. Especially as I got a chance to catch up on some podcasts. It's time for a new car though. My one has come to the end of its company life and I have to chose a new one. I will miss my Mazda 6, it has been a lovely drive, and very reliable. Given a choice I would go for one again, especially as they have been restyled (in black look almost Batmobile-like now). But we are now limited to a few named marques. That isn't a complaint, there are good cars available. I have always said I won't have a BMW. Sorry if this insults you but beamer drivers seem arrogant t..sers on the road, they seem to think they own it. Well, for the purpose of research and so I could cross it off my list I went to look at the BMW 520d. Then I sat in it. And fell in love. It is a beautiful car. The inside is simply gorgeous. And for the pleasure of driving it I am quite happy for people to think I am a t..ser (don't jump in there with "they already do"). I get a test drive next week, just to make sure, but my mind is already there.

Forward Pass

In rugby news today Northampton Casuals children beat Northampton Casuals parents.

It was the end of the season for the casuals. And the end of the season sees a match of kids versus parents. Not all the kids and all the parents in one go, that would just be a bundle. The kids stayed in their respective age groups. We had 7 kids against 4 grown ups. A number of adults claiming bad backs. I was just glad I started going to the gym a month ago (and to be honest, knowing this was coming up was a driving force behind joining). There was a fundamental problem in the rules, in that grown ups could only take three steps before they had to pass. Well, because we were passing backwards as you should, this meant we ended up going backwards overall as our steps forward were shorter than our passes back. Then trying to get the kids tags when they were so low to the ground wasn't easy.

It was great fun. Really enjoyed it. Maybe next time we won't let them win.

Money Money Money....

It must be funny being a politician. So many ways to claim expenses. There are so many options that it must be difficult to ensure you are claiming everything that you are entitled to! And then you can blame the people who check your expenses if you get it wrong.

The approach seems to be to try and claim things and, if passed, then it is allowable. However there seems to be no consideration towards what is ethical or right to claim. The attitude is to push to the limit. The practice of "flipping" seems especially dubious. Whether or not it is allowed, does it seem fair. When people are having problems paying their mortgage, or affording necessary repairs to their hose, politicians are able to simply redesignate their house in order to fund new furniture.

There was another time when a group of people blamed their behaviour on the rules. That time it involved concentration camps and the rules were their excuse for numerous horrors. Once rules can be used as an excuse and devolve reponsibilty for decency then society can degenerate to dangerous levels.

Expired

I have been away for a few days. So rather surprised to find that my computer has died while I have been away. The computer seems to boot up OK but then none of the USB ports are working. Which rather puts a kybosh on the thing. Keyboard and mouse out of action. So everything inaccessible. Any suggestions?

Up and Down, Again and Again

Bank Holiday. So important to do something. Don't want to waste it. but then again the weather looks terrible. Especailly up north. Especially near Chester Zoo where we had suggested we might go for the day. And despite efforts the daughter still wants to go. Suggesting that rain may not be the best for walking around a zoo she responds that we have hoods. To show how desperate I got, please understand the levels I must have sunk to in order to suggest staying in Northampton and going to the cinema in order to see Hannah Montana. It can't get worse than that. And still the zoo was the prefered choice. So we got in the car and set off. As I watched the rain falling on the windscreen I felt a journey time of over 2 hours each way was not compatible with being rained on. And then a brain wave. A flash of inspiration. I suggested Drayton Manor. Goooaaaaaallllllll. Yes, that was a good idea. So we went there. And it was cold. Especially after the water flume ride which gets you extrememly wet. But it was a good day. 5 (or was it 6) times on the Waltzers was a bit much (as "J" won't go on fast rides this falls to me) but it did mean we did the vertical drop only once so was a blessing in some respects. And we went to the zoo section, which was better than I expected, I can recommend going to see two absolutely beautiful tigers. At one pont "A"s lips were so blue that I thought she would get hypothermia, but she wouldn't give in and we were there until kicking out time. And she went to sleep within minutes when we got home, exhausted but happy.

Flipper

So I joined the gym about three weeks ago. I am still going, and more than I expected. This is good. I am not convinced that it has helped the waistline yet, which is bad, but at least I am persevering. Interestingly though (for me if no-one else) it has helped the fitness. When I first started I was incredibly disappointed to find that I couldn't even manage 10 lengths of the pool. I used to be a good swimmer. I couldn't do much else but I could swim. So I was rather shocked by my inability to pull myself through the water. Since then I have not swum, I ahve spent the time in the gym. Today, for a few reasons, I ended up swimming. And I managed 40 lengths! I think that is an incredible improvement. And, to be honest, the main reason I stopped was because it was getting a bit monotonous.

One In The Back

If anyone can explain to me how the term "lamentable failure" is not to be seen as a criticism then I was be very grateful. You'd have to think that Hazel Blears 100% support for the Prime Minister is of the same calibre that he has often given people before they find a knife in their back.

And this comes only a few days after Peter Mandelson commented on his relationship with Blair, and arguments with Brown, irrepairably damaging his political career. I don't know if Mandelson has looked around recently but, for the record, Brown gave him a job.

With friends like these, who needs Conservatives!

Achoo

It doesn't take long. In completely bad taste but great fun, try to stop the spread of swine flu.

Open Sesame

It's All About Respect

There are some things in this world that should be "no-brainers". The Gurkhas are one of them. It is really so simple. If you are willing to die for a country then you should be allowed to live in that country.

Not So Level

Well a big thank you to the BBC. Anyone watching "Ashes to Ashes" tonight will have had their negative preconceptions of the masons well and truly reinforced. I may feel a little miffed at this point.

Boxers Lose Match

Debenhams have announced that sales of Y-fronts are up 35% during the recession. And, indeed, the last time the Y-front outsold the Boxer was during the last recession. This seems somewhat strange. WHy should a recession affect the style of undergarment. I ahve a theory. When things are going well, then people feel free and easy. Therefore they like their bits to be free and easy as well, leading to boxers or even commando style. In a recession everything feels rather tighter, rather more restricted, so the underwear follows suit.

Find Me

Someone I know is able to write apps for the iPhone. This is very clever. What he lacks is ideas of what to write. I suggested a tool for Eddie spotters. I am sure you know the game, made famous by Ben Elton, look out for Eddie Stobbart lorries, gain points by being the first to spot them (my record is over 60 on a trip to Scotland, I lost count in the end). And each Eddie lorry has its own name as well (always female, initial single names, then double names, now on to Polish). So I thought that there were all kinds of things you could do - how many Eddies to the mile, a forum so you can check where someone last saw "Anne-Marie", post photos of your favourite Eddie. The possibilities are endless. And, of course, no-one would lie about how many they spotted (maybe photographic proof would be needed). Finally realised though that the prospective audience for such an app may be very low, as indicated by the Venn diagram below:

Help

Anyone know how I can make a Venn diagram and then insert it in to a blog post? (It's the insertion bit rather than the Venn diagram bit that I am struggling with).

Gurgle

Those who know my political leanings will guess that I think increasing the income tax is a bad thing. But ignore the fundamental philosophy for a moment. I have heard it said that this will lead to a drain of the talent from the city. Surely it's the so called talent that got us in this mess in the first place!

Disney - One Moment In Time

Amazing how similar they can be:

Squeaking

I've been getting a bit of a routine going at the gym. After using the equipment or swimming I use the spa and sauna. I convinced myself that it was good for the muscles and helping me cool down. Hence I was rather disappointed tonight to realize I had left my speedos at home. And while I am not too shy I felt that the rest of the club didn't deserve THAT much of a shock so felt I should give the spa a miss. And I have discovered that I was right. The spa/sauna does help the wind down. In fact it makes a big difference. As demonstrated by the fact I later had problems getting up the stairs. I seized up. WD40 is required.

Hush - Deep Purple

I got a certan little girl shes on my mind
No doubt about it she looks so fine
Shes the best girl that I ever had
Sometimes shes gonna make me feel so bad

Hush, hush
I thought I heard her calling my name now
Hush, hush
She broke my heart but I love her just the same now
Hush, hush
Thought I heard her calling my name now
Hush, hush
I need her loving and Im not to blame now

(love, love)
They got it early in the morning
(love, love)
They got it late in the evening
(love, love)
Well, I want that, need it
(love, love)
Oh, I gotta gotta have it

Shes got loving like quicksand
Only took one touch of her hand
To blow my mind and Im in so deep
That I cant eat and I cant sleep

Listen
Hush, hush
Thought I heard her calling my name now
Hush, hush
She broke my heart but I love her just the same now
Hush, hush
Thought I heard her calling my name now
Hush, hush
I need her loving and Im not to blame now

(love, love)
They got it early in the morning
(love, love)
They got it late in the evening
(love, love)
Well, I want that, need it
(love, love)
Oh, I gotta gotta have it

50-12

Cardiff vs Gloucester in the EDF final (rugby if you have to ask). The Anglo-Welsh cup. And the Blues trounced Gloucester. Down at Twickers. Watching what was a fantastic match. Yes I would think that because my team won. But the reality is that the Blues played a wonderful, spell-binding game. Beautiful passes. Wonderful tactical awareness. You don't see rugby of this calibre often. I took 212 photos of the day and have subsequently deleted 102 of them, but that is the advantage of digital.

And the important thing is I can say, I was there.

Thought

Life is nothing if you don't let it be an adventure

Stretchy

Two weeks in and I am still going to the gym. In fact I may have gone from one extreme to the other. Swimming Monday, gym equipment Tuesday, Tai Chi Wednesday and equipment again today. I have even made a "Gym" playlist for my iPhone, although it needs a bit of tweaking to get the right songs on it (I had to remove the Daniel Powter song tonight, it didn't have enough energy to it). I ache, especially my calves (that was the Tai Chi, an hour of standing with your legs bent). And I am really not enjoying the treadmill, it isn't nice on my shins. The rower is fine, the hand bike I enjoy, the bike is OK, the X-trainer acceptable. But the treadmill is horrible. Despite the aches I feel good. And what is really exciting is if I manage to get down to Royal Mail tomorrow they are holding two parcels for me, some clip-on ear phones (Sony MDR-AS20J) and an arm band to hold the iPhone.

Aww

According to my daughter I am like a big teddy bear to cuddle. I really don't need to blog anything else for the day.

Burning Up

This morning on Radio 4 they were interviewing a climate protestor who was in support of the planned attack on a coal station. They want all coal power stations closed down immediately because of damage to the climate. Which sounds great, but if done overnight then where are we going to get our power from? There seems little question that we need to move away from fossil fuels, but we can only do that when an infrastructure has been put in place to take up the needs. Otherwise we don't have enough power. And without enough power, people will die. It isn't exactly a thought through policy.

As it is they are targetting EON, and blaming the company. Actually EON have a green option, we are on it, and it ensures energy comes from renewable sources. But the thing is, not enough people are willing (or able) to pay the extra. Don't blame the company for supplying what is demanded, first you need to convince the public of the need. Once the public are paying for the green policies then the companies will follow. They are simply reacting to market forces, and the biggest demand is currently for fossil fuel power.

Take That

So Gordon has expressed regret for the personal attacks made by his aide. Or rather, like previous Labour misdemeanors, has basically expressed regret at being caught out. And once again Gordon knew nothing about it. I am beginning to think he knows very little about what his MPs and their advisors are up to. We have heard that he knows nothing about it so often in the last 12 months that you have to wonder what he does know about. I so love that he has asked the Cabinet Secretary to tighter up the rules on what politicians and aides are allowed to do. This shouldn't need to be a rule, common decency should be enough, respect for our fellow man no matter his political leanings should be enough. No, this is the way they are lead, these people follow their leader, and their leader is down to agressive dirty ricks becasue he realises that the game is up.

Hup Two Three Four

So I survived the induction. Although he made me a programme and introduced me to the various pieces of equipment he didn't make me do it all there and then. But I tackled it this morning. While the treadmill was not an attractive sight I did at least complete the course. In fact may even have to increase one or two sections.

During the induction I was asked why I had joined. To lose weight and to get fitter were my replies. He was quite a good trainer and immediately said he didn't think talking about weight was a good target, it is more to do with proportion and image. Which makes sense to me. So he wanted a target. I thought a bit then decided the best target, if we weren't talking weight per se, was to aim at getting a couple of sizes down in the trouser waist area. Then he waned to know what my target for fitness was, what did I mean by more fit. That is somewhat harder, I don't exactly want to run a marathon or to climb Everest. I was a bit stumped for a while. Finally I came up with something. I explained that I do support and security work at some festivals over the summer. So the target fitness is to be able to run after, and catch, the bad guys!

Hup Two Three

I just thought I should let you know that you may never hear from me again. In ten minutes time I start my induction at the gym. There is a good chance I won't make it through. In which case, farewell dear friends, farewell cruel world, farewell to all. If I see the light coming for me then I am going to run for my life (although that might be why I am seeing the light in the first place)



PS - it only seems fair not to keep you all in suspense and to let you know I am still here (not that I was deluged with notes of concern anyways)

Almost Something About Mary

The following will not be in good taste, may be inappropriate, and certainly is not for those easily offended. Consider this a warning, and I will leave a spoiler space so you don't inadvertently read on.







I use an electric razor. It is a very clever one. It incorporates a lubricant system which pumps out Nivea shaving conditioner at the touch of a button. There I was this morning, minding my own business and having a shave. I heard someone knocking at the door. As I was the only one in the house I rushed downstairs. It was someone wanting to trim our conifers. Fine, had a bit of a chat, said goodbye, closed the door, and went back upstairs. Then I looked in the mirror. And I feel that answering the door, half dressed, with globs of creamy white stuff over my chin and cheek may not be exactly the kind of image I generally wish to portray.

And if you don't understand the implication of that last sentence then, fine, my mind is clearly more base than yours, and I refuse to go in to explanations :-)

Nothing Sweet About Me

The first time in over ten years that we aren't going to Dartmouth on holiday, and Paington Zoo have tiger cubs. Typical.

Do Not Pass Go

Followers of my Facebook updates will already know I had a nightmare (or even a McVicar) of a journey. Considering the short distance travelled set against the long time taken, it may even be the worst I have ever had. I normally get in to work at 0800 hrs. I left home at the normal time today. And didn't get in to the office until 1045 hrs. I spent a rather long time sitting in a rather major traffic jam on the M1. And it could have been avoided if they had only turned on the hazard sign at the sliproad on to the motorway. Instead they waited an extra 500 yards or so to warn you, ie once you were completely committed and couldn't back out of it.

What those wwho follow my Facebook won't know is that it was actually worse than that. An hour into the epic journey my mobile rang. It was home. Wondering if I had meant to leave my laptop sitting on a side table! The answer being, if you hadn't guessed, NO.

Do you ever feel on some mornings that you were't supposed to get out of bed.

Goodbye

At the risk of going against public opinion, I just don't get the Jade Goody thing. I cannot understand why so many people were at her funeral, why so many people were so upset, why so many felt they had lost a close relative.

She was an enormous character, that is true. As much becasue she manage to understand how to use the fact that people laughed at her. She was the 21st century version of a clown. From the moment she was spotted on Big Brother she had utilised the attention. No-one has been more famous for not being famous. Or more famous for saying the most ridiculous things. And I don't begrudge her that. She came from a very poor background. It was good that she managed to find some pleasure, even if it was often at her own expense.

What she was able to do was to manipulate the Eastenders culture. She turned her life into a story, and people wanted to see more becuase it made them feel big, made them feel that at least they were better, more intelligent, than Jade.

But the modern world seems to have lost a sense of proportion. We saw it when Princess Di died. And we have seen it since, in things like the Maddy case. We have moved to a mass emotion, where the vox populi sheds its tears as one, where if one person bleeds then we all do. And it is strange. Where most of the time we won't even talk to our neighbour we are able to feel utterly distraught and bereft over someone we don't know. Maybe, dare I say, we would be better learning how to be ourselves and to help each other, than to rely on an event to bring us together and make us feel worthwhile.

Walking

There are many miles to walk. Sometimes it is neccesary to keep to the wide road, well lit, many people brushing past you. Other times you have to take a detour, dive off into the undergrowth, place your feet on virgin soil. Others may occassionally go your direction, a special someone may even walk the rest of the way with you, some you thought were friends may disagree on the route, or even simply get lost. But there is never any point in thinking back and wishing we had taken another turn. It is human nature to wonder "what if", to imagine the unicorns you may have seen had you gone a different way, but it is destructive to wish to see those things that may never have been on the path anyway.

Fired

It can be very difficult to find anyone that you want to win on The Apprentice. Often it is more a case of who you don't want. Followed by disappointment when Sir Alan doesn't care that the canapes are made out of cheap food. It can also end up difficult to even feel sympathetic to those companies who agree to be guinea pigs. And last nights episode was a case in point, I almost felt sorry for them as their fnction was ruined by tinned tuna, but the woman in charge rather blew it by refering to a slice of tomato on the floor as a "health and safety issue". Sorry, no sympathy left now.

A Partisans Daughter

Well that didn't take long did it. I started reading it last night and I have already finished. Wonderful tale. And strange, because in many ways nothing happens. But gripping. Every page holds you, makes you a part of it all. I do wonder if it is very much a male book, would it speak to a woman in the same way. It might. And I wonder how much it was because it spoke to me, where I am. Someone else may not feel it in the same way. But try it at least.

Whhhooooo

Do you or do you not believe in ghosts? I have spent the evening in a haunted pub. Honest. The ghost is called Mary. How do I know that it was haunted? Well, there were two bars, the "Vault" and the "Lounge". It was a quiet night so the door to the Vault was locked. And yet the pressure pad just inside, that rings whenever anyone enters the Vault, kept sounding. For 10 minutes, even possibly a quarter of an hour, there were regular buzzing noises. Until the barmaid yelled at Mary to stop. And then there were no more. Spooky.

A Partisan's Daughter - Louis de Bernieres

Just 4 pages in to this book and I have to post in order to tell you, no order you, to read this. Gripping

Watching

The Jacqui Smith story is one of hypocracy in so many ways. For someone who has just been championing a move to stop the exploitation of women, her husband being found to have watched porn while she was away has to be embarrassing. For someone who has been trying to get rid of sleaze in politics then making the public pay for accessing the channels is even worse. And notice that while he apologised to his wife for embarrassing her, if you listen to what he says he doesn't apologize to us for putting it on expenses. He actually doesn't see what he has done wrong. Then you have politicians who think that they have a right to claim on expenses because they think that their salaries are too low. These are the politicians who are happily capping fireman, nurses, police etc. But possibly the biggest hypocracy is those who are shouting the loudest. Many of those papers expressing shock that he watched porn are owned by those men who also own the pay channels, who provide the programmes that they profess to be shocked by. We live in a world where irony is a way of life.

Piano Life

Sometimes things,really simple things, can make me smile. I am in Harrogate for a couple of days for a conferance. And I have found a brasserie with live jaz. As i hadn't booked they have squeezed me on to a table that is really for the people at the bar waiting for their proper tables. So I have music, I have my book, and a world of different characters milling around. And I am very happy with it all.

Addendum - the book is "trying to save piggy sneed", I have a crisp dry White, I am surrounded by 1949 pin up calenders, and the singer is singing Valerie. It can't get better

Spending Spree

So here we are, recession looming, money tight. And a G20 meeting to discuss the problem. To think about the man in the street. So exactly how much is Obama spending in order to attend? $20 million, yes that's right, $20 million! You have to wonder exactly how a hop across the water from the USA to the UK can cost that much. Even flying first class with those really luxury seats that turn in to beds. To be fair though, he is living up to the demands he is making of other countries. He is constantly preaching that we should stimulate spending, encourage it even. Obama seems to be doing that at least.

Lost In Space

Dogs, monkeys, humans, and now spiders in space. Two orb weaving spiders have been sent on a holiday to the International Space Station. Although one of them may not have made it the other is reported as fit and healthy. In fact it isn't quite known what happened to the one as it escaped a few days after launch. Luckily the one that is missing was the back up spider, only required if the chief came to grief. It is interesting that the orb spiders seem to have been rather thrown by the lack of gravity. Instead of their normal beautifully arranged webs, they have spun a tangled mass of threads.

That's one small step for a spider, one giant leap for arachnidkind, and another, and another, and another, and another, and another, and another.

Don't Squeeze

First it was the Mosquito, a noise emitting device that squeaked so high that only teenagers could hear it. The aim was to stop them congregating in certain areas. An aim slightly undone by the fact that teenagers soon realised that recording the sound and using it as a ring tone meant that teacher couldn't hear their phones texting during class. So now we move onto colour lights, more particularly a pink fluorescent light that shows up spots. I am, I have to admit, somewhat dubious. These are kids who go down the local (I was going to say disco but suspect that might age me) night club. If I remember corrrectly those places were packed with fluroescent lights. And especially ones that could highlight every blemish you had. And certainly did not make one flee in embarrassment. So I am fairly sure that the modern day teenager, packed full of more confidence than we were 20 years ago, will be able to cope with a pink light. Of course, if they can't, then they may resort to balaclavas under their hoodies, and that will be even more intimidating.

So Cool

This is so cool. I am in a hotel and blogging from my iPhone. I have nothing to actually say but it is still cool

Suits You Sir

I have finally succumbed. It's taken over 8 years but I can resist it no longer. And what is "it"? Well, I am finally wearing suits to work. Today being the first day. Since I joined I have refused to wear a suit, on the simple enough grounds that "vets don't wear suits", even in industry. But at the weeeknd I went out and bought two new three piece suits (yes three piece, if it's worth doing then it's worth doing properly). I had to buy new suits, not because I don't have any (I already possessed three) but because I don't want to wear the same clothes both in and out of work. From now on it's the new improved (well smart) me.

Ring Ring

So I am the proud owner of an iPhone. What fun. Ignoring the fact that it doesn't have enough memory for all my music then generally I am very happy with it. And the music thing was always going to be a hard ask, I have almost 19gB = 463 albums = 11.5 days of music on the computer, and growing weekly if not daily. So I am going to have to get cleverer with rating songs and the iPhone will just have those of three stars or more.

For years I have been used to a Motorola RAZR, which was a beautiful phone (I had the one in red, lovely colour, the iTunes one) so this is a bit of a change. But it was dying. Been dropped once too often. And having it unlocked from my old networked didn't help it. So now it was often freezing, the quality of voice was dropping. It really was time to commit to something new.

And for a gadget man this is a great toy. Still trying to find aps, but I have found the one that can match up music titles to whatever is playing. It can even find Harvey and the Wallbangers songs, not exactly the most well known of bands. Then it will give you biographies of the group, discographies etc. Incredible. From an initial slight disappointment (I love my music and want it with me everywhere) I can see that this is just going to grow and grow on me.

Ah, Bliss

A visit to Whittlebury Spa today. Massage and body scrub as well as the day using the heat and ice rooms. I have had a tough time recently, in all aspects of my life, so I felt that some pampering was necessary. I don't get much pampering, and it seemed a good idea to take it into my own hands. Duly pampered I feel better, and my skin has a healthy glow as an added bonus!

Battle - Colbie Caillat

I Kissed A Girl - Kate Perry

Under Pressure

Zzzzzz

Recent research has shown that teenagers have a different body clock which drives them to get up later and go to bed later. It is then supposed to become more normal again as you get older. In fact men and women don't have the same up and down times until they are in their late 50's.

So I wonder why mine never reset once I was passed my teens.

Being Human

Up Ahead

I've never been one for the 5 year plan. Generally lucky these days to make it from day to day. Certainly most days don't turn out quite how I expect them. But lacking a 5 year plan is definitely a draw back when it comes to industry. The line that I enjoy what I do and simply need to keep being given challenges doesn't help people work out where to place me. I get frustrated when I don't feel as though I am moving forward, but my definition of moving forward is "wobbly" at best. And because I do enjoy what I do (most of the time) I tend to be good at taking on extra things while not so good with giving things up. But every so often I take my destiny into my own hands, and each time that has lead to a step forward. Feeling it is time to do so again.

Loch Lomond - Runrig

If you ever see this live I promise you it will give you goosebumps



By yon bonnie banks and by yon bonnie braes,
Where the sun shines on Loch Lomond.
Where me and my true love spent many many days,
On the banks of Loch Lomond.

Too sad we parted in yon shady glen,
On the steep sides of Ben Lomond.
Where the broken heart knows no second spring,
Resigned we must be when we’re parting.

O ye’ll tak’ the high road and I’ll tak’ the low road,
And I’ll be in Scotland afore ye.
Where me and my true love will never meet again,
On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomond.

Ho, ho mo leannan
Ho mo leannan bhoidheach
repeat 8 times

You'll take the high road and I'll take the low road,
And I'll be in Scotland afore ye.
Where me and my true love will never meet again,
On the bonnie bonnie banks of Loch Lomond.

You'll take the high road and I'll take the low road,
And I'll be in Scotland afore you.
Where me and my true love will never meet again,
On the bonnie bonnie banks of Loch Lomond.

You'll take the high road and I'll take the low road,
And I'll be in Scotland afore you.
Where me and my true love will never meet again,
On the bonnie bonnie banks of Loch Lomond.

You'll take the high road and I'll take the low road,
And I'll be in Scotland afore you.
Where me and my true love will never meet again,
On the bonnie bonnie banks of Loch Lomond.

On bonnie, bonnie banks
repeat 9 times

Hey, Hey, Hey....

Don't Blink

I am not sure which I would hate to lose more, my sight or my hearing. Gut reaction is sight, but then I think of a silent world with no music and that seems like a very lonely idea. Whichever, I can understand why Ron would be so excited to get at least some vision back after 30 years. There are many things that I would take joy from after 30 years, but being able to sort my socks out would not be top of the list. Even more, I think I might be a bit miffed if my wife thought that the best thing about me being able to see was that I could do the washing. I would hope that I would be talking about going for walks, being able to see the world around me, whereas she's just happy that she can teach him how to use the washing machine.

So La Te Do

On a day when original masters of recordings made in the early 1900s by Dame Nellie Melba, the biggest singing star of her day, have been discovered, it is strange to consider that one hundred years ago the singers voices were perfection but the recordings were terrible, now the recordings are perfect but the singers are terrible.

Kerching

I agree that he is getting a lot of money, and seems to be awarded for failing. But I also think that the Sir Fred story is a bit of smoke and mirrors. If Labour can make us concentrate on what is actually, in the scheme of things, a completely irrelevant story then we might just miss the fact that they are using all our money to stoke up the system.

I am, however, fascinated by Harriet Harmans comments. There are two that really do take closer examination. The first is "The prime minister has said that it is not acceptable and therefore it will not be accepted." Now that seems to endue dear old Gordon with rather more power than to which he is entitled. Surely that is the kind of comment you would make about a dictator. It suggests that Gordon can rewqrite the rules to suit himself. Am I mistaken in thinking that the point of a democracy is that no-one is above the law (although recent behaviour by Labour certainly indicates they have lost sight of this rather basic fact). I rather think that Gordon feels that it won't be acceptable for the Conservatives to win the next election, but I am hoping he doesn't think he can stop it happening.

Which brings us rather neatly to her second comment "And it might be enforceable in a court of law, this contract, but it is not enforceable in the court of public opinion." Correct me if I am wrong, and I know people with a better understanding of the law than me happen to read this blog, but surely the point is that the court of law takes precedent over the court of public opinion. I feel that if public opinion still held sway then we would be dunking witches, burning people at the stake, and doing unspeakable things to them with sharp pointy implements.

The problem with politicians is that they are too ready and willing to bend to public opinion. I want my politicians to stand up for what is right. To be the moral weather-vane when the tempests blow. To stand up and tell us that while they understand how we feel they also know that the law protects our culture and our lives. That erosion of small parts of the law simply because society doens't like something is the first step to undermining the entire structure of our being. I need politicians that are willing to be unpopular because they know that being right sometimes means make the unpopular choice.

Sleep Tight

It seemed such a good idea at the time. Move "A" into a bigger bedroom so she would have more space. First mistake was deciding this just AFTER have the landing redecorated. No pressure there then when I move the bed. Any damage to the paintwork and guess whose toast. Then the second problem was considering the practicality of the matter. "A" has a bunk bed, one of these bed on top desk underneath things. So there was going to have to be some dismantling first. The theory was a good one, take off the top, bed, part, it is so designed. And all was going well until I got to the last screw. And proceeded to strip the head off it trying to get it undone. So there is now no way of converting this into a low bed for a while until I can move the entire thing.

Hence discussion with daughter about what she wanted. To be fair as she has got a bit older her head has appeared perilously close to the ceiling at times. And too my relief she opted for wanting a normal bed. So instead of a fairly big struggle we went down to IKEA (I know, yet again, we are very good customers and have more boxes for recycling than the rest of the street together). It was an interesting experience, trying to get a 6 year old to choose a bed. But after over an hour we had narrowed the field down. And it was in stock. Great. Wife told me it wouldn't fit in the car, I said it would. We bought said bed. Got to the car. Whoops, car not quite as long as I thought. Not to be defeated I did get it in, but the boot didn't close, and "J"s knees were up to her ears the seat was so far forward.

Got it home. Put it up. And daughter now thinks I am wonderful and loves me dearly because she is in her new room. Still needs decorating, and discussions on that are on-going (the options being two pink walls and two purple walls, or all walls a light blue BUT with a rainbow and clouds and sun (actually at one point she wanted a sunset but I have convinced her that that is a bit too optimistic)).